Quoted from Dreamscale LOL...I didn't vote for my own, Anthony.  I thought I made that clear already? What I did say, was that I gave mine a recommend along with 2 or 3 others. If mine was the best, I would have voted for it.  Anyone who thinks the script in question is one of the best is as high as a kite, on a flight by Ben.

Pluralism isn't a concept you like, is it? The process of rating scripts is a subjective one, and I'm glad it is, or many good movies would never have been made. Imagine some Jeff would decide which scripts are made into a Hollywood movie and which aren't. I suppose the porn industry would get a good boost, but that's not something I'd even like to imagine.

Quoted from AlsoBen Why am I suddenly involved in this? Is this because I liked a script you didn't? You're a child with gross silver hair

Why do you say you're involved now?  What you talkin' bout, Willis?

Speaking of children, you must be too young to catch the song reference in what I said, not a comment directed at you.  Really?

Quoted from Dreamscale the song reference

Rocket Man

P.s. "by Ben" or "by then"? Memory slip-sliding away.

Quoted from Stumpzian Rocket Man P.s. "by Ben" or "by then"? Memory slip-sliding away.

I think it's by "Ben" - as in Benjamin Franklin flying his famous kite.

"She packed my bags last night, pre-flight
Zero hour, nine AM
And I'm gonna be hiiiiiIIIiiiiiigh as a kite by then..."

Google is your friend...

Not diggin' this 'Readers Poll' right now. Cause now I get to be upset not only once, but twice about my script, lol. That is, assuming the Writer's Choice is gonna show me similar results... ack!

"All the boys think she's a 'spaz', she's got Bette Davis eyes..." I think that's right? I better Google it to be sure...

I'm quite happy my script is doing well in the reader's poll, which I didn't expect, really. From start to finish it took me like two hours of work and I found quite a few typos and lousy word choices since then. Didn't really have much time, lots of business travelling at the moment. But I have to say, the comments were really helpful this time, not that many one-liners as usual. I tried to give helpful feedback in my comments as well, but I didn't manage to read&comment more than about 20. If anyone wants a feedback after the OWC, please just PM me.

And my favorite script is on 2nd place here, and all the others I voted for are in the top 11, so I guess most of us liked the same stuff.

Quoted from Equinox I'm quite happy my script is doing well in the reader's poll, which I didn't expect, really...

To be fair towards the comments on my script; I've received probably %90 positive reviews (re: writing style, voice, etc.). I'm just kind of bummed out (with myself) that after all the scripts I've written, I'm still receiving almost the exact same feedback as previous entries cause my stories don't (really) make any sense, and people are dropping out cause they don't know what was happening.  

In the future I'm gonna have to make a decision... sacrifice the writing style I like to portray, vs. a comprehensible story.

The biggest problem, always, in OWC's is creating characters/stakes that we care about. It's such a challenge. Very, very few stories succeed even a little in achieving this.

Often the problem is the page limitation.

For example, my favorite script was Pinnochio. But this story also failed to create stakes or characters we cared about or sympathized with...even though it was based on a story we already know, so that saves the writer a lot on exposition.

We could have care about the puppet more if we saw him struggling more with trying to be good. Instead, there were hints of his being evil right from the start almost, since he kills the dog for no reason. So before he is even rejected by the father, he is sadistically evil(was he practising on the dog?).

We might have sympathized with the father, but he turned on the puppet very strangely for no reason.

And we didn't know the daughters enough to care. If anything, their coolness toward the father made them not sympathetic.

The Enchanted Quil was another top vote getter. There's a clever idea there. But the girl is sadistic from the moment we meet her. Yes, we come to learn why, but there is really not much reason to ever grow to care what happens to her. She shows no humanity, no potential for growth, other that the quick action at the end to save her soul, which comes across as expedient.

It's very hard to do in limited space. In my story, I fell into the usual trap of making the story too complicated in an effort to make us care more about the characters. So that's the other end of the spectrum, stories that are not simple and clear enough.

Quoted from Equinox From start to finish it took me like two hours...

By contrast, I spent more time working on this script than I did on any of my previous OWC scripts. I've received very few positive comments and no votes in the Readers Poll. I'm not complaining. A writer does the best he or she can and puts it out there.

Quoted from Gum In the future I'm gonna have to make a decision... sacrifice the writing style I like to portray, vs. a comprehensible story.

Rick, your past work is outstanding, some of the most high concept stuff I've read here. You've also come a long way with writing style in a screenwriting sense. We've all read some scripts and said  to ourselves "that writer definitely wrote that", but if we were to watch a film you wrote we'd no doubt say, "Rick definetly wrote that."

John,

Right on, brother!

After awhile, when we crank out another script (after 10 or so), we literally become our own worst critics and, forget that we got into this because we thought it might be fun to learn something new, that is... until we become obsessed and take to heart.

I truly appreciate your kind words of encouragement. Seriously, it does make it all worthwhile this... this crazy idea of screenwriting. Hope to see you in the next round, cheers!

Quoted from Gum In the future I'm gonna have to make a decision... sacrifice the writing style I like to portray, vs. a comprehensible story.

Concur with Johnny. The trick however, Rick, (ooh, I'm rhyming) is to combine both. Don't sacrifice too much of your style cause otherwise it could read generically and bland - be disciplined where perhaps you know you're getting carried away with yourself, but combine it with cohesive story. Story is always key.

I was reading the other day (damn, can't remember where) that screenwriting can still be literature. I agree with that.

Some of the best scripts I've read, and subsequently the best films, jump off the page like streamlined novels. Surely that aids in them being noticed , ( the writer's voice being noticed) and marketability.

But it does all come down to story ultimately.

I struggle with the problem of overwriting but I usually get comments that the description and story was worth it.

Not always, mind you... If I get: 'love the writing but the story went nowhere/I don't get it? or, unsatisfying ending' then I know I've failed.

I usually know when I don't have a fully fledged crowd pleaser in the beginning, and I'm just entertaining myself with style over substance. Sometimes that's okay when you just want to take part in an OWC, This time around I knew the ending to my entry was going to defeat all the good that went before it so I decided to delay and work on it more. Least, OWC inspiration has given me something to work with and I'll post it up later.

If you think you've got something with your story and overwhelmingly positive comments, don't ditch it Rick, do another draft.

Libby,

Thank you for the detailed feed back. I hear you, (wo)man, lol. You're gonna hate me and, I can't prove it cause the script thread is gone now but, you told me almost the exact same thing about two Halloween OWC's ago... I should have heeded your advise by now, at least you'd think I would have cause it is sound advice. Apparently I'm like a nail; you have to hit it a few times before it holds, lol.

On a lighter note. There are 9 users on the board tonight. Everyone is out at a party or the bar for Halloween, and I'm stuck at home cause my 15 yo daughter is having a Halloween party, and I have to make sure they don't get into my booze, lol. Any ways, Happy Halloween! Here's to a Tuesday morning candy coma...

Well jeepers, I think that means I just sound like a broken record.   My apologies. I have enough trouble taking my own advice...

Ha! Halloween, eh? It's only just starting to creep into our culture in a big way now with advertising/costumes, the whole knocking on doors thing. Kids would be lucky to get an apple out of me. I think I'll just pretend not to be home.  

Hey, good luck, Rick.  I'm picturing you now standing guard over the liquor cabinet. Sounds like fun actually, and least you have the perfect opportunity to pick up teen-speak on mass for your next script.

Quoted from Gum "She packed my bags last night, pre-flight Zero hour, nine AM And I'm gonna be hiiiiiIIIiiiiiigh as a kite by then..." Google is your friend...

Oooops!  This shows, once again, hat even the very, very, VERY best can be wrong every once in awhile.     Ha...I'm wrong so often, it's not even funny.