Update!

I received a phone call from the individual who sent out the email SimplyScripts Screenplay to a number of writers on the discussion board.  He most profusely apologized for what he did realizing in hindsight (and with some help from Pia) that perhaps the email was not the best approach.  

I accepted his apology.

If you have received the below unsolicited email with the subject line, SimplyScripts Screenplay, please be aware that it was sent out without my knowledge.  

If you have any questions, please post here or Contact Me

Spam Message (contact info redacted).  

Do not post the name or email address or identifying information of the individual on the discussion board.  

I just wanted to reach out as I saw your script on SimplyScripts. I'm a full-time writer and have much experience in story structure. I'm offering my services to help pump up your script. I found that no matter your level of screenwriting experience, all top grossing screenwriters throw a second pair of eyes on their screenplay. The truth is, you’re so married to your script that it’s IMPOSSIBLE to see the flaws. Quentin Tarantino, Oliver Stone, Woody Allen, they all do it.

Screenwriting and directing is what I do. My feature was picked up by William Morris Agency and submitted to Sundance 2016. I’ve worked with some well respected actors and have been featured on a magazine cover. I’m willing to work with any budget and I’ll go through your script and send it back with a band-aid but solid notes as well. Every script is different and I can offer different levels or doctoring whether you want a phone call, notes, minor changes in Final Draft, etc.

If interested, shoot me an email and let me know what exactly you need and the budget you are working with. I'm open to any level of help but I will ultimately guarantee that your script will get a solid makeover and catch more eyes in this industry. Here are typical problems I see with new writers.

-On the nose dialogue
-Weak story structure
-No conflict/action/resolution
-No internal/external storylines
-Character Arc
-Story not sure what it wants to be

Let me know! Thanks!

Yep.  Me, too.  Marked as spam and sent to Yahoo as unsolicited.  

While I have no problem with someone looking to add clients to their personal service roster, the method here is terribly sketchy in my opinion. Don was never approached to ask if that was okay (which, of course, it isn't.)  And it's the equivalent of walking up to a stranger you don't know on the street and saying, "Hey - I noticed you have a crappy haircut. Not you particularly - just everyone in general. I went to beauty school.  If you pay me, I'll fix that for you!"

Really.

I got the same. Think I can get my three hundred bucks back?

Thanks for the heads up.

He should have the decency to go through the proper channels and at least pay for advertising. Spam doesn't look good unless the service you're offering is free. It also says something about this person. Like, he doesn't have any money. Not having any money is not a good indication of quality (in a business sense). Go through the proper channels, gain real respect and do it the right way.

Dustin -

Here here.  Well said.  I agree; 100%.

Cheers,

--J

Loving the fact that he's got fewer credits than Pia and we get her feedback for free

I don't think he understands what SS is all about.

I didn't get one cos all my scripts are perfect.

Got it too. Love the spam button in my mail program.

Quoted from JonnyBoy I didn't get one cos all my scripts are perfect.

Jonny -

I SWEAR this is just tongue in cheek - but before I got mine, one of my SS colleagues had already received theirs.  My reaction: Dammit!  Apparently, he's decided that my work is far beyond repair.  (Gee, gotta talk to Page about that; they keep bumping my stuff up.  Oh, and those rascally options that I got for no good reason.  Quick!  Lemme sell some of my worn-out writer blood to pay for that $300...)  

Cheers,

--J (W)

Quoted from AnthonyCawood Loving the fact that he's got fewer credits than Pia and we get her feedback for free I don't think he understands what SS is all about.

That, too. LOL!  

"...featured on a magazine cover."

If it's Penthouse, I may be in for the $300 for a personal consultation. Video's fine.

I didn't get an email so I have no idea who this particular consultant is, but I thought I would try and help him out by criticizing his writing. Isn't that nice of me?

Quoted from Unsolicited Email I'm a full-time writer and have much experience in story structure.

It's interesting that you go with the vaguer term "writer" rather than "screenwriter," in which case you could have cut the mention of your experience with story structure as that would have been inferred by the expression "full-time screenwriter."

Quoted from Unsolicited Email I found that no matter your level of screenwriting experience, all top grossing screenwriters throw a second pair of eyes on their screenplay.

If you mean to say that all top grossing screenwriters hire a script consultant to tell them what's wrong with their script, that's absolutely false.

Quoted from Unsolicited Email The truth is, you’re so married to your script that it’s IMPOSSIBLE to see the flaws.

This is demonstrably false. I've never written a draft I thought was absolutely perfect. I see flaws in my own work. In fact, that's kind of a screenwriter's job. Knowing what works and doesn't work in a screenplay is the talent. I've known very few screenwriters who couldn't see any flaws in their work. Screenwriters who can't see any flaws in their work usually disappear shortly after they arrive.

Quoted from Unsolicited Email My feature was picked up by William Morris Agency and submitted to Sundance 2016.

I'm confused by this statement. First off, the William Morris Agency merged with Endeavor and became William Morris Endeavor. I would think maybe this happened some time ago, except you say they submitted it to Sundance 2016. I find this odd. WME is a talent agency, not a distributor. What do you mean they picked your feature up? And why would a talent agency submit your feature to Sundance instead of the production company? What the hell are you talking about? This needs to be clarified. But good luck with your feature becoming an official selection in Sundance 2016!

Quoted from Unsolicited Email I’ve worked with some well respected actors and have been featured on a magazine cover.

Great. But what does being on a magazine cover have to do with screenwriting? Why would a magazine even put a screenwriter on the cover? A scriptmag perhaps? Oh, that's right, you don't tell us which magazine so it's completely useless information anyway. Please consider adding more specifics here.

Quoted from Unsolicited Email Here are typical problems I see with new writers. -On the nose dialogue -Weak story structure -No conflict/action/resolution -No internal/external storylines -Character Arc -Story not sure what it wants to be

Great list. It was a great list the last time I saw it. And the time before that. And the time before that. This is just the same old regurgitated stuff all script consultants parrot. Come on, surely you can do better! Try and come up with some unique twist or fresh take on the premise.

I'm sure my notes will help you rewrite your blurb into a more effective ad. I'm always glad to help out new writers. That'll be $300.

Bre -

OMG.  I SO, SO, SO wish there was a "Like" button for SS posts.  That response has me giggling on the floor.  )

Cheers,

--Me

I didn't get that email so I feel a bit left out.

I love Bre's response. That was superb!