Stranded by Matthew Merenda - Drama - Four teenagers attempt to wait out a blizzard inside a marooned SUV. - doc, format

Well, your log line describes exactly what happens in this story.  The problem is that it describes exactly what happens.  They sit, and talk, and complain, and eat chips, for the pretty much the duration.  I was hoping for a little cannibalism, you know?

(spoiler)

You finally have two of these characters leave the car, and at that point I thought the story might start rolling.  But you just lose these guys.  I mean, Mike shows up later (mysteriously), but Sam is never heard from again.  This is the story's greatest weakness.

What was going on with Sam and Mike was probably far more compelling than what was going on inside the car.  This piece could be made much stronger if we know their story as well.  How, or why, did they get separated?  Did they disagree about whether or not to continue?  Did one turn back?

Cut away from George and Rachel every once in a while to fill us in on the drama going on outside in the snow and your story will be far more compelling, I think.

Quoted from bert Well, your log line describes exactly what happens in this story.  The problem is that it describes exactly what happens.  They sit, and talk, and complain, and eat chips, for the pretty much the duration.  I was hoping for a little cannibalism, you know?

This sounds.....exciting.

The cannibalism, I don't see that much in Drama screenplays, but whatever floats your boat!