SimplyScripts Discussion Board
Blog Home - Produced Movie Script Library - TV Scripts - Unproduced Scripts - Contact - Site Map
ScriptSearch
Welcome, Guest.
It is April 23rd, 2017, 8:45am
Please login or register.
Was Portal Recent Posts Home Help Calendar Search Register Login

If you wish to join this discussion board, please send me a message. Please do read the guidelines that govern behavior on the discussion board. It will make for a much more pleasant experience for everyone. A word about SimplyScripts and Censorship
The Scripts of the April '17 OWC are live!


Short Script of the Day | Featured Script of the Month | Featured Short Scripts Available for Production | Submit Your Script

How do I get my film's link and banner here?
All screenplays on the simplyscripts.com and simplyscripts.net domain are copyrighted to their respective authors. All rights reserved. This screenplaymay not be used or reproduced for any purpose including educational purposes without the expressed written permission of the author.
Forum Login
Username: Create a new Account
Password:     Forgot Password

SimplyScripts Screenwriting Discussion Board    Unproduced Screenplay Discussion    Drama Scripts  ›  Long Shadow Woman Moderators: bert
Users Browsing Forum
No Members and 2 Guests

 Pages: 1
Recommend Print
  Author    Long Shadow Woman  (currently 2960 views)
SimplyScripts
Posted: December 8th, 2010, 8:50pm Report to Moderator
Administrator
Administrator


So, what are you writing?

Location
Virginia
Posts
11085
Posts Per Day
1.87
Long Shadow Woman by Craig Clyde (screenrtr) - Bio, Adventure - Turn of the century Arizona.  An outcast woman and a wounded Apache boy.  One will teach.  One will learn.  Both will change. 108 pages   - pdf, format

Based on a True Story

Craig was recently interviewed on SimplyScripts Radio.


Visit http://www.simplyscripts.com for what is new on the site.


-------------
You will miss 100% of the shots you don't take.
- Wayne Gretzky
Logged
Site Private Message
grademan
Posted: December 10th, 2010, 6:11pm Report to Moderator
Green



Location
Wisconsin
Posts
900
Posts Per Day
0.31
Clyde.

The most enjoyable script I have read in a long time.  I could feel the desert sand in my boots.

Thanks for posting.
Logged Offline
Private Message Reply: 1 - 4
Electric Dreamer
Posted: December 27th, 2010, 11:58am Report to Moderator
Yellow


Taking a long vacation from the holidays.

Location
Los Angeles
Posts
2866
Posts Per Day
1.18
Clyde,

Thanks for posting your script.
I just wrapped up the first act.
I'm looking forward to getting back to your story as time allows.
I wanted to say that I appreciate the cadence of your script.
I feel a sense of pace and the time period pouring from your words.
It's subtle and there's a quiet elegance to it. It helps me get into your story.

Thanks so much for sharing, I'm excited to see how this one turns out!

Regards,
E.D.


LATEST NEWS

CineVita Films
is producing a short based on my new feature!

A list of my scripts can be found here.
Logged
Private Message Reply: 2 - 4
Electric Dreamer
Posted: December 28th, 2010, 1:18am Report to Moderator
Yellow


Taking a long vacation from the holidays.

Location
Los Angeles
Posts
2866
Posts Per Day
1.18
Clyde,

I have to say this is a fine read. Your command of pacing and language is stalwart.
Maggie in my mind, looked and sounded like Frances Sternhagen in "Outland".
I don't know if that makes any sense at all, but there it is.

It's quite a story and honestly the third act feels a bit truncated.
I enjoyed your characters so much, I felt like some arcs got a bit under foot.
I am not a fan of montage or voice over heavy stories, but this one works.
I didn't understand how the soldiers found the hidden Apache.
Did Maggie leave an unintentional blatant trail or something?
There were shades of "Dances with Wolves" in the third act.
But you have the virtue of a true story on your side, so it didn't phase me at all.
I could see this going on a bit longer and perhaps a longer koda.
I wanted more resolution with all your great characters.
It's more of a compliment than a complaint, hope it reads that way.

Thank again for sharing, best of luck with all your endeavors.

Regards,
E.D.


LATEST NEWS

CineVita Films
is producing a short based on my new feature!

A list of my scripts can be found here.
Logged
Private Message Reply: 3 - 4
gamtkn
Posted: April 23rd, 2011, 11:24am Report to Moderator
Red


Posts
1
Posts Per Day
0.00
Must say, I wasn't drawn by the logline of this. It sounded trite, which is a such shame for such a GORGEOUS story!  Elegant, terse, vivid - we're with her every moment - and very moving. Plus fresh and original. We get fascinating insights on that other side of the American Indian story - the integrating and meshing with them that also went on. I have Cherokee blood myself and have often heard other 'white' Americans admit that they have Crow, Blackfoot, or other Indian ancestors in their family tree. "Dancing with Wolves", "The Last of the Mohicans" show that too, but the focus or upshot is always on the 'exterminations' or 'disappearance' of the tribes. I suspect however there were far more Maggies than we realize, and I just loved 'seeing' one, at last!  Great subject - hope it gets made!

On the helpful feedback front - two tiny quibbles. On pg 89, there were two bits (the hunting for deer scene & return, and 'the children are progressing in school' bit) that were not illustrated by anything concrete (ie, how do we know?) Very minor fixes that I mainly noticed because you'd done such a fabulous job of avoiding that till then!
Also - watch your "it's".  "It's" is a contraction of "it is". The possesive form is "its" -
no apostrophe. An editor dressed me down for that years ago, so I noticed!  Best of luck, Craig!  A brilliant and very deserving story.
Logged Offline
Private Message Reply: 4 - 4
 Pages: 1
Recommend Print

Locked Board Board Index    Drama Scripts  [ previous | next ] Switch to:
Was Portal Recent Posts Home Help Calendar Search Register Login

Forum Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post polls
You may not post attachments
HTML is on
Blah Code is on
Smilies are on


Powered by E-Blah Platinum 9.71B © 2001-2006