Yeh well done to both of you guys! I had them both as my top picks, gonna be a tight one I think between the pair of you but Weather Worn I feel has got it, unless there's one that I completely missed that was getting rave reviews.

I'll PM you the tell, Dave, just as I know you like to use it and I've never marked you down so your secret identity is always safe with me...

I wrote 2, one for you guys and one for me. Should be pretty obvious which one was for me

I wrote Riot Time Knock Off and It’s Killer. Tone was off in Riot, as it started to turn into something of a silent movie with all the gesturing. Terrible of me to call the gun “cold, steel.” Not good to trick the readers. My bad. Oh, and the A/C was broken. I thought I’d made that clear when you saw the open window. Oh wait. Maybe he didn’t pay his bill. Wait. Maybe he just doesn’t like using the frickin A/C!!

It’s Killer was just a fun little thing I thought of while mowing the lawn! I like that one better anyway.

Great challenge, loads of fun as always.

Quoted from Dreamscale And a title page in large, bold letters!!!

so proud of you for that!

WE have had a terrible time with mosquitoes this year in the backyard... so you all can probably guess which one I wrote. While I was pulling weeds they were eating me alive and the story popped into my head.

Quoted from Pale Yellow WE have had a terrible time with mosquitoes this year in the backyard... so you all can probably guess which one I wrote. While I was pulling weeds they were eating me alive and the story popped into my head.

Yours and Rain Check got my top marks. Good work, Dena!

Thank you Steven.

Quoted from Pale Yellow WE have had a terrible time with mosquitoes this year in the backyard... so you all can probably guess which one I wrote. While I was pulling weeds they were eating me alive and the story popped into my head.

Rain Check!!! Twas a delightful plodder that one, a rare beast in my mind, don't like slow burns but that was a great little script. Another well done!

Sod it. I felt sorry for Libby so asked permission to do a COLD ONE, as I've only just returned from Aus a few weeks ago, now it turns out she didn't even enter one!!!

Through sheer stupidity I went with 2. Damask Memories as a serious entry, and You Should Be Ashamed, Richard to keep myself entertained. Ta for the reviews, especially on You Should Be Ashamed as I thought it was gonna get killed

I apologize for not getting to every script. Was a crazy week with school starting again and Friday night I helped a family member move so my plan to review the stragglers fell to pieces. That also means I missed the voting deadline but since I didn't read them all I would have felt unconformable voting.

That said, I wrote Change. Any mention of terrible comma use should be a dead giveaway for me by now in the reviews, lol. I had an idea for a cutesy almost Pixaresque short in mind when the original idea popped in my head and I almost put the category as animation instead of comedy, excuse me drama, but realized it had no affect on the story so didn't. Readers were right that I made the lead too wimpy to be likable though I was hoping some of his personality came through when he took Jill out to see things with new eyes. Some people caught that, but not enough did so I needed to do better. The ending also gave me fits as page length forced my hand a little. Of all the scripts I've submitted for OWCs this was my least fav and weakest I think. But it shows as writing this gave me some fits. I am thankful for the exercise though.

This is one I'd like a do over on with a stronger premise that really embraced the challenge. That said, Wish You Were Here and Tunnel Rats were the top favs of what I read though this OWC was a mixed bag. I did like the shorter page length as that made reviews quicker.

When's the next one?

Quoted from Pale Yellow WE have had a terrible time with mosquitoes this year in the backyard... so you all can probably guess which one I wrote. While I was pulling weeds they were eating me alive and the story popped into my head.

Well done that one!

Right, off to sleep. Congratulations to whoever wins.

I liked yours, Cam, as you can tell by my review. One thing though, characters not being given real names is not a valid criticism, thought we'd been through this before.

Seven Year Itch, Fist Full of Dollars, Good Bad and the Ugly, Layer Cake, Fight Club, 12 Angry Men, etc, etc, all good examples of nameless laden classics.

Anyway, shall draw a line under it and we can debate in my thread for You Should Be Ashamed if need be.

Sweet dreams peoples,

Cam x

Quoted from eldave1 Well done that one!

Thanks Dave... now which one is yours? You usually have a contender.

Quoted from Pale Yellow Thanks Dave... now which one is yours? You usually have a contender.

Weather Worn

Cam, you're a gem. A really nice thing you and Pia did for me. Sorry your efforts were in vain. Honestly I didn't know I was out until last minute.

Dena, great work. My absolute favourite.

Dave, great work, crummy title. I'm a horse lover from way back. Beautifully written.
Btw, the prep is worse than the procedure.

I shoulda known Wish You Were Here was Jeff's. A few things give it away in retrospect, the cocaine, the rum, the hot couple on the beach. And this:

For some reason, this hit me rather hard and I actually had to go outside and have a smoke when i finished.


Very entertaining you lot!

I wrote Deserter.

Got the idea late and decided to get it done asap as my birthday was the same day the scripts were due.

I read a lot of a fantasy book series I'm into right now and very little screenplays, so that would explain my heavily overwritten entry. Just got to writing it out and never really payed attention to how I was telling the story.

I did have a different ending planned out. It still would've played out as Hubert being attacked by those he deserted but that last image would've  revealed that he was nowhere near water, the oxen were actually dead, and he was suffering from exposure before he succumbed. It may have made the ending a little better anyways.

His fellow travelers weren't intended to be zombies, I was going for a more "Wild West Mummy" type of deal. It's crazy how well preserved that mummy is. I thought it would make a good thing to haunt Hubert with with the others looking somewhat like that guy.

Thanks to all those who have commented.

After I read your example eldave1 I re-read my entry and seen just how overwritten it is.

Quoted from LC Cam, you're a gem. A really nice thing you and Pia did for me. Sorry your efforts were in vain. Honestly I didn't know I was out until last minute. Dena, great work. My absolute favourite. Dave, great work, crummy title. I'm a horse lover from way back. Beautifully written. Btw, the prep is worse than the procedure. I shoulda known Wish You Were Here was Jeff's. A few things give it away in retrospect, the cocaine, the rum, the hot couple on the beach. And this: For some reason, this hit me rather hard and I actually had to go outside and have a smoke when i finished. Very entertaining you lot!

Thanks, Libby. Very glad you liked it. I'm okay with the title - although did like the one you suggested and - yes the logline does sucketh. Threw one on at the last minute.

I know about the prep (this is my second one). UGH and double UGH.