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SimplyScripts Screenwriting Discussion Board    One Week Challenge    May 2018 One Week Challenge  ›  Becker: Pilot - OWC Moderators: DanC
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  Author    Becker: Pilot - OWC  (currently 2353 views)
ericdickson
Posted: June 13th, 2018, 10:33pm Report to Moderator
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Being a huge Ted Danson fan and Cheers being my all time fave,  I never really got into Becker but I do appreciate the show and caught a few episodes here and there.

I think you nailed the character's delivery and verbiage.  Lots of popping dialogue as Becker jumps from one character to the next as would an ER doc seeing multiple patients.  I love the retirement home setting.  Being already cynical, grumpy and impatient this would be the ultimate test of Becker's patience and compassion.

I also like the correlation between the setting and Becker's own battles with aging, thoughts of suicide and his relationship with his daughter.  I loved the idea of him jumping from home to home and moving in and out of his daughter's house.  

I think this is actually a great reboot idea.  It's definitely dark and could go too far as old people are an easy target, but could also be very very funny with an older audience.  





    
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EWall433
Posted: June 21st, 2018, 7:24pm Report to Moderator
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Some of the banter works pretty well, but it’s also pretty dark for a comedy. Ten minutes in and the lead character of a sit-com is trying to kill himself. Even if the original got this intense, it’s a little early to be starting it up here.

I doubt she’d leave Becker in this state. I don’t know what suicide watch looks like in a nursing home but she’d at least take the rope.

So the whole period after menopause thing sounded surprising to me. I Googled to check. I know doctors hate it when you take Google’s word over theirs, but Becker’s not a real doctor and Google says bleeding after menopause could be a sign of a serious disorder.

The final scene is too rushed and the tone suffers for it. Having Becker change his mind seconds after Jim’s death is a little too sudden. I’m also not sure how much Becker being suicidal really matters in this story. You could lift it and still have him go through a very similar arc.

All complaints aside, what’s attempted here is more or less what I would expect from an update of Becker. It’s got a good arc and the dry, dark humor occasionally works. Could use some tinkering, but it basically hits the mark.
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