We often argue/discuss format and style of writing and what's right and wrong or acceptable or not acceptable in script writing. We also hear over and over that a professional reader/agent/producer might not read past the first page if it "looks wrong".

My question here is, would you read past this first page if you opened up this script? If so why? What is it in this one page that made you want to read on despite the way it's written. Big blocks of text, past tense and on and on.  Just curious...  

That's different, though. I doubt Tinker, Tailor was a spec that an unknown writer was trying to drum up some interest in. Also, it's an adaptation of a novel, so you're working with dense, wordy raw material (especially since it's Le Carre), which is bound to make your writing novelistic.

It's that 'one rule for us, another for them' thing again.

Given this page cold?  No, I would not.

But assuming there is a compelling logline that holds the promise of a good story, I would not toss it aside based upon a few broken "rules".  And there is plenty of superfluous action going on here.

I know what this is, btw, and am surprised to find the script so cluttered.

Atleast they got the spacing right.  Nothing hits my eyes harder than a cluttered, tight mess of a script that can't breath.

I'd read beyond this page for two reasons: although blocky and wordy, it isn't bloated or narrative, it's well-paced and visually written; and because it's a classic spy story set-up, building tension in seemingly innocuous events that the audience instinctively clues into. But more than that, the writing itself is confident and carries an undercurrent of secrecy and espionage that promises to make for an entertaining and engaging read. Being adapted from a novel makes sense, but also negates your query since it will never be read like a spec. If someone were to write a spec like this, however, I think it would be well received, depending on genre.

Since we are playing this game, I think I have a good one from a recent script that fewer are likely to recognize.

This first page grabbed me by the collar right off, and I wonder if others agree.

Bert, as the first page of a spec I'd say reading beyond it would depend greatly on who receives it. Getting hit cold with such graphic, heinous imagery threatens to put the audience off, perhaps beyond recovery. What follows had better be phenomenally well-crafted and redeeming.

Speaking for myself, I'd only continue reading if there's something in the logline to suggest the story will allow that opening. Otherwise, no matter how well-written it is, I'd start by questioning the writer's decision to use that opening and wonder what other questionable decisions might have been made, and is it worth the time to figure out.

Yeah, good points, Rene.

That is what a logline is for, I guess -- and what makes it so hard to judge a single page without any context -- which is something you would never have to do in real life, I am pretty sure.

But yeah, the logline for this one makes it pretty clear that you are getting into a very dark thriller sort of script.

I like that one bert!

My thoughts when I first opened up TTSS was that it hurt my eyes. If I had opened an OWC script that looked like that on the first page I would have closed it right back down. But since this script is award nominated, I figured I should at least read the first page. I did and I was immediately intrigued. So....if those insiders will decide after the first page whether or not they should continue to read, it seems to me that the content of the page is far more important that the style.

You would like the script, Pia, if you have not seen it already.

As for your page, I would be seriously put-off by some of it -- the mini-skirt girl (worthless detail), the Magyar (WTF?), the underlining (why?) -- but not by the dense text itself, which reads fine to me.

It is the little things about that page that bugged me and not the big stuff.

Yes, I would.

What people don't seem to realise is that a fast paced, quick read type of script is great for fast paced, Hollywood style films...not so good for thickly layered stories with heavy and deep characterisation.

It's screen savvy and visual...down to the point of the expert introduction of the main character in the scene. textbook stuff, but still something often missing in scripts. There's no exposition and we're instantly in the thick of the action.

Scene 2 builds the mystery very nicely...whom is following whom? Is something going on here, or not?

The tone is paranoid...almost like the person who wrote it has OCD and is writing everything down they can see. This fits in with the story-line perfectly and invites us directly into the world of a spy where every little detail may be the thing that saves your life.

I liked them both. The only thing about the first one that bothered me was the way the Magyar was introduced. It made me look back and reread, because it sounded like he had already been introduced. That's annoying. But other than that, it was good. Strong visual images.

I think it's hard to judge a script on just the first page. Yes, most of the amateur writers might be weeded out based on the first page, but other than that, how much should we expect the first page to do? Sure, it's great when the first page is a real attention grabber, or creates tension like the second example, but plenty of great films don't do that in one page. I think what I'd be looking for in the first page is simply this: a reason to turn to the second page.

Quoted from bert You would like the script, Pia, if you have not seen it already. As for your page, I would be seriously put-off by some of it -- the mini-skirt girl (worthless detail), the Magyar (WTF?), the underlining (why?) -- but not by the dense text itself, which reads fine to me. It is the little things about that page that bugged me and not the big stuff.

Hmmm...I'm not sure.

The purpose is to subtly suggest that anyone could be a threat. From the burliest man, to the fashionable bimbo. 2/3 of the world's assassins are women....because men have few defences against a pretty girl. It also gives a sense of the time...and also subtly suggests a potential discrepancy...would a girl on the streets of Budapest be wearing a mini-skirt in this time period?

I can see that the Magyar is confusing...but they are a specific ethnic group in Hungary.

I do think people miss the importance of these little details at times, in their rush to make everything a super fast read.

Again depends on what you're trying to accomplish.

Quoted from Scar Tissue Films 2/3 of the world's assassins are women....

Haha...this is the most made-up crap I have ever heard, Rick  

Cite your sources!

I heard a former MI6 agent say it on the telly when they were talking about the Litvinenko assassination.

It's obvious when you think about it. Most of the targets are men, and security will keep most men away at all times.

A beautiful 18 year old in a red dress on the other hand...