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I'm working on a script with different gangs. The gangs are the "Savage Animals" and the "Savage Demons". The leaders are Pablo and Caesar.
Previously, I've done "Savage Animal # 1" or "Caesar and his Animals", or "The Demons stare him down". But I dunno, I didn't like the images I conjured up (you immediately think of Animals/Demons or "Power Rangers" or something ha)
So last night, I changed it to "Thug #1" and "Caesar and his Thugs" and "Pablo and his Cronies". And then when interacting with them as a gang - I went "Jack points a gun at the Savage Animals". Sometimes, I've even gone "Caesar and his gang" or "Caesar and his men" (which I'm not sure about as I don't want too many names, also doesn't feel right to cap them too).
I know clarity is key, but I figured one needs some kind of consistency so the script reader is never confused (which is why I've made it Caesar "Thugs" and Pablo "Cronies").
My question: has anyone else come across this problem? I'd hate to give someone/some people too many names. I know it's a little problem - but the wrong word or constantly changing names can be quite jarring and stop a reader in his/her tracks.
Well, if possible you could give the gangs scary-but-inanimate nicknames so there’s no confusion (no one will picture Ceasar and his Razors literally).
Once you’ve settled on faction names, you can give individual gang members lines without signaling main character status with names like MOTORMOUTH RAZOR, JUMPY RAZOR, INTENSE RAZOR, etc. You can tag minor members of the COP, RESIDENT, etc. factions as well.
What FrankM said. These are minor, expendable characters so stuff like "Henchman #1" or "Thug #7" are perfectly acceptable, but there's no harm giving them a little personality to differentiate them from one another.
Burly Henchman Wiry Thug Stuttering Crony Twitchy Gangster
Ever see the Robert Rodriguez flick Desperado? In the script he refers to one of the bad guy's thugs as simply "Shrugs." The entire movie, every time someone addresses that character, he shrugs. It's a funny little detail that makes memorable what would have otherwise been a non-entity of a character.
I'd establish early on in the script how you will be referring to them as a group and keep that the same. I'm currently writing a story with 4 characters who pretty much never stray from each other's side. So when I refer to them as a collective, I use "Our heros". After you've established the term you will use, then consistency is key.
As for characters that are just Thug 1 Thug 2 type... If you have multiple thugs on both sides of the conflict (Savage Animals and Savage Demons) I'd suggest adding the group's title to the name. So instead of Thug 1, try Animal Thug 1, Demon Thug 1. That way, we don't have to keep track of which thug is in which gang. Muscle-bound Thug doesn't tell me what side he's on. Sure, when you introduce the character I'll know, but by page 50 when there's been 6 different Thug characters introduced, I won't remember.
I'd simply write it...
THE SAVAGE ANIMALS (a street gang) get out of the car. Its leader is Caesar. (34, looks like he aggressively works out).
Blah Blah The Savage Animals stand firmly
Blah Blah Jack points his gun at Caesar.
ANIMAL THUG #1, 23, less muscular than the others, steps forward in front of Caesar.
Jack You must be the new guy.
ANIMAL THUG #2, 33, biker pulls his gun from it's holster and points it at Jack.