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SimplyScripts Screenwriting Discussion Board    Unproduced Screenplay Discussion    Short Scripts  ›  Scooter Moderators: bert
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Max
Posted: June 13th, 2015, 8:29am Report to Moderator
Been Around


Ain't nobody write like that, bruh.

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No probs bruh.

Keep it rolling.
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Cmantics
Posted: June 13th, 2015, 9:05am Report to Moderator
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Quoted from LC


Julian, thank you for elaborating. I was concerned I'd perhaps gone and written something very un-Australian but I see you were really getting down to the nitty-gritty. It's interesting cause I think there are regional differences within Australia too but I won't labour the point. Suffice to say, you brought up some interesting points.


No worries. Yes, I had hoped I didn't appear too picky - I'm just very interested in language usage and any nuances   I really thought the story was well done.

Julian
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DanC
Posted: June 14th, 2015, 1:51pm Report to Moderator
Old Timer


Killing villains since 1980!

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Quoted from LC
I don't compare them at all, cause they're very different, and don't get me wrong, you're allowed to like whichever one you want over the other. I had a lot of fun writing Simpatico cause it came from nowhere, it seemed, and effortlessly, which is rare.  I'm thrilled if  anyone likes anything I put up, so thank you, Fen.  


I actually think it's very hard to like one of your creations over another.  It's like asking which child do you like better?  It's easy if one is a CEO and the other is in prison for 50 trillion years, but, even then, a parent might not be able to really choose one over the other.

Yes, Libby, I love Abba actually.  I think my fav song is "Does Your Mother Know."  

Yes, I've turned in my man card again, I wonder when, if I will ever see it again...

I wonder how others feel about their stories, if they have favs or not.  I know I can't ever decide which story is better...

Dan


Please read my scripts:
http://www.simplyscripts.net/cgi-bin/Blah/Blah.pl?b-series/m-1427564706/

I'm interested in reading animation, horror, sci fy, suspense, fantasy, and anything that is good.  I enjoy writing the same.  Looking to team with anyone!

Thanks
Dan
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Marcela
Posted: March 27th, 2019, 3:56pm Report to Moderator
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Hi Libby,
I liked the script very much. The ending nicely shows how relative/pointless our dreams are. Not very optimistic! I think such ending is very good for a short film. If it was a feature, perhaps you would need a happy ending. Perhaps she would fall off the scooter, Aaron would help her back on her feet, they would start sharing his bike... a bit cheesy, I know...


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LC
Posted: March 27th, 2019, 4:53pm Report to Moderator
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Marcela, thanks for your feedback.

Been a long time with this one.

Funny thing is I changed the ending of this to be more optimistic and female empowering.

I realised the ending was a bit of a downer and it could be improved upon.
I think dreams are important, striving for them, and though not all of them come to fruition, some do.

Seems this is not the updated draft.

I'll get on it and send Don the updated version.

Thanks so much for (inadvertently) alerting me to it.


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