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SimplyScripts Screenwriting Discussion Board    Unproduced Screenplay Discussion    Horror Scripts  ›  Fade to Black - Sold Moderators: bert
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  Author    Fade to Black - Sold  (currently 2433 views)
Don
Posted: January 28th, 2006, 11:38am Report to Moderator
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So, what are you writing?

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Fade to Black by Alan Olivas - Horror - The movie centers around a reality show named "Fade To Black".  In the show, seven contestants are put on investiagtion assignments of the paranormal.  With the winner or winners getting ten million dollars.  The last show of the season, they are sent to investigate a church which is said to be haunted by the ghost of Sister Theresea.  A nun who commited suicide over her undying love for Father Patrick, who, was a child molester.  Now some twenty-three years later, the contestants are forced to spend an entire night in the church. - doc, format


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You will miss 100% of the shots you don't take.
- Wayne Gretzky

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Don  -  March 21st, 2018, 3:17pm
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ChipPollo
Posted: January 29th, 2006, 4:31am Report to Moderator
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I enjoyed reading this. My favorite character was definetly James, I can relate to him. Call me crazy but all through the script I had this feeling him and Allen had a thing for each other? Kinda like Ben Affleck and whats his names character in chasing Amy. Am I just imagining this?
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Lon
Posted: January 29th, 2006, 11:10pm Report to Moderator
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I can't comment on your story because I was turned off almost immediately by the tremendous amount of misspells -- at least five within the first three minutes of reading, which is where I stopped.

It may sound nit-picky, but that kind of thing will get your script tossed aside faster than you can say "spell check."  

Your descriptions seem to include tidbits which are inconsequential.  Does a female character being a registered nurse have anything to do with the story?  If not, drop it.  If it does, don't TELL us she's a registered nurse.  SHOW us she's a registered nurse.  Same for many other character descriptions ("he's a real estate agent," etc.).

I can't speak for other readers here, but I lose interest quickly when format and spelling errors stand out more than what's actually being told or said.  Some here and there are okay if it's just a draft you'd not planned on submitting -- but when they're more prevalent than any script or character aspect, I tend to just not bother.
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robb_blaze014
Posted: February 5th, 2006, 3:34pm Report to Moderator
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good script It needs to be made into a movie!!!!!!!
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the goose
Posted: February 6th, 2006, 2:33am Report to Moderator
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Yippie-kay-ay.

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ok I'm now starting to read this and already the first five pages have annoyed me. Like hell would three or four big-time businessmen (the TV executives I mean) use that many expletives, It's ridclious.


Actor trying to write...

"A good script is never rejected because of layout or lack of technical jargon. If people like it, then any experienced film or TV PA or secretary can lay it out in professional manner and add all the technical terms necessary"

-- Ronald Wolfe "Writing Comedy"

"We don't make movies for critics, since they don't pay to see them anyhow."

-- Charles Bronson.
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tron11
Posted: February 6th, 2006, 10:09pm Report to Moderator
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GUys thanks for the replies.  I am writing a second draft and I'm using what you guys are writing to make it a better script.  So, thanks everyone and I hope the second draft will be better.
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Don
Posted: March 21st, 2018, 3:18pm Report to Moderator
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Sold!


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You will miss 100% of the shots you don't take.
- Wayne Gretzky
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Mr. Blonde
Posted: March 21st, 2018, 3:29pm Report to Moderator
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What good are choices if they're all bad?

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Wow. Talk about taking the long route to a sale. Congratulations. =)


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eldave1
Posted: March 21st, 2018, 3:34pm Report to Moderator
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Much congrats


My Scripts can all be seen here:

http://dlambertson.wix.com/scripts
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Dustin
Posted: March 21st, 2018, 5:29pm Report to Moderator
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Action speaks louder than dialogue.

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11 years, wow.
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