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SimplyScripts Screenwriting Discussion Board    Unproduced Screenplay Discussion    Comedy Scripts  ›  Battle Frogs Moderators: bert
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  Author    Battle Frogs  (currently 2147 views)
Don
Posted: July 24th, 2006, 8:26pm Report to Moderator
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So, what are you writing?

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Battle Frogs: Operation Desert Skullf*ck by Dave Hitler - Comedy, Farce - Lance and Dwayne are two ordinary karate champions, but their world is turned upsidedown when Bin Laden kidnaps the president and their girlfriend and turns Lance and Dwayne into awesome frogs. Can the Battle Frogs beat up Al Queada, save their girlfriend, and stop Bin Laden from unleashing his evil plan(s)? 60 pages (caution - strong language) - html, format


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-------------
You will miss 100% of the shots you don't take.
- Wayne Gretzky

Revision History (2 edits; 1 reasons shown)
bert  -  July 25th, 2006, 7:50am
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bert
Posted: July 24th, 2006, 9:12pm Report to Moderator
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Buy the ticket, take the ride

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You know, I tried to give this an honest look.  I did.  The title had a certain something.  Within the first coupla' pages:

I shrugged off the subtitle that reads "2001 - The Future".

I frowned at the vulgar and juvenile segment with a character known only as "Girlfriend", but slogged ahead, ceding to the author's artistic license.

Then I came to this segment of dialogue:

               PRESIDENT
               Lets just say (some dorky line
                meant to back up his claim)

               BIN LADEN
               (offscreen)
                (Some witty pun that undercuts the
                president's line.)        
               (EDIT) STUFF GOES HERE

What is this -- Mad Libs?

Don is knocking himself out trying to keep up with script submissions and you give him this?

Please try a little harder next time.


Hey, it's my tiny, little IMDb!
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dogglebe
Posted: July 24th, 2006, 9:48pm Report to Moderator
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I took a look at this because of the title.  It sounds like something Balt would come up with.

I couldn't get past the karate tournament.  It was so ridiculous that I believe the writer knows absolutely nothing about martial arts or MA competitions.


Phil
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bert
Posted: July 24th, 2006, 9:59pm Report to Moderator
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You know, I wasn't gonna mention this one -- but the more I thought about it, the more it kinda' ticked me off.

Here is another segment I wasn't too crazy about:

--------------------------------------------

EXT. WORLD TRADE CENTER # 2 - 9:03 AM

A jet plane smashes into WTC2. LOL.

--------------------------------------------

LOL?


Hey, it's my tiny, little IMDb!
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greg
Posted: July 24th, 2006, 10:00pm Report to Moderator
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Oh Hi

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Quoted from bert

--------------------------------------------

EXT. WORLD TRADE CENTER # 2 - 9:03 AM

A jet plane smashes into WTC2. LOL.

--------------------------------------------

LOL?


The author's name is Hitler.  Go figure.

I can't figure out if the STFU in the locker room is an abbreviation or he's supposed to be saying that to be funny.  I'm confused.


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dogglebe
Posted: July 24th, 2006, 10:04pm Report to Moderator
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Quoted from bert


EXT. WORLD TRADE CENTER # 2 - 9:03 AM

A jet plane smashes into WTC2. LOL.


Pretty fucking tasteless.  Can this script be deleted or locked for this reason?


Phil

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Breanne Mattson
Posted: July 25th, 2006, 2:53pm Report to Moderator
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I too was unable to finish reading this vulgar piece of tripe. The sex scene with the girlfriend reads like a penthouse forum letter from a teenager trying to sound sexually ďexperiencedĒ when anyone can plainly see itís just some teen talking about something he knows nothing about. Not only is it obvious that this writer hates females, itís plainly obvious he doesnít even know anything about females.

Itís like this was written by a kid who saw his first porn yesterday and started puberty the day before.

Itís also plainly transparent that this author is attempting to come off with the same vibe of Team America.

This vulgar, obnoxious timewaster doesnít even have humor to redeem it in any way. A comedy has to be funny. Vulgar misogynistic and immature sex fantasies arenít funny.

I give this a bomb rating. Pitiful.




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Breanne Mattson  -  July 25th, 2006, 3:15pm
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The boy who could fly
Posted: July 25th, 2006, 3:00pm Report to Moderator
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well with a title like that how could anyone resist.  this is how far I got.

                                          BOLO
                         Oh yeah, I forgot, you guys are
                         brothers. How come one of you is
                         white then? Is you mom's cunt like
                         half white and half chinese or
                         something?

                                   LANCE
                         STFU, okay.

                                   BOLO
                         Or does her cunt make chinese
                         babies and her ass make white
                         babies?

Good work



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dogglebe
Posted: July 25th, 2006, 6:22pm Report to Moderator
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Quoted from Breanne Mattson
I too was unable to finish reading this vulgar piece of tripe. The sex scene with the girlfriend reads like a penthouse forum letter from a teenager trying to sound sexually ďexperiencedĒ when anyone can plainly see itís just some teen talking about something he knows nothing about. Not only is it obvious that this writer hates females, itís plainly obvious he doesnít even know anything about females.


Maybe it's a sequel to The Cabin.

Does anybody know if this guy posts here at all?


Phil

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
I Apologize  for hijacking Phil's post, but I didn't want to bump this thread up.  Locking it.  I think that "Dave" has probably gotten as much out of the discussion as he is going to.  

Don

Revision History (1 edits)
Don  -  July 25th, 2006, 6:34pm
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