The Nightmare of Alexander by J. Kane Drummond - Short - A young boy is tortured and abused by his own drug addicted mother. He must find a way to escape or die. 9 pages - pdf, format

   Umm.  Well.  I'll hint at the technical errors, first.  The first huge one is the spelling.  Doing the quick math, I'd have to say that about 18% of the words in the script are spelled wrong, which isn't very good for only being nine pages.  Even the mistakes that do spell words, are the wrong words.  Like 'barley', I think you meant 'barely', and a ton of 'he' that should have been 'the'.  That's not anything a quick spell-check and a proofread can't fix, though.

   The second, and most important thing, is the format and structure.  There shouldn't be any camera directions what-so-ever until the shooting script is written by the director.  The camera directions and angles just take away from the ebb and flow of the story, which in essence is the most critical point of a spec script.

   Also, something that could help the structure is rewriting the details.  A lot of unneeded sentences could be cut or simply reworded, once again to push the story along at a better pace.

   As for the story itself, and I'm speaking as a huge fan of gore and controversial topics, I think went a little bit overboard with the hostility in the fact that you don't give any reasons for the mother acting so savage, besides the drugs.  Which, I'm kind of wondering, how she gets the money to pay for the kilo.

   Maybe, with a few major rewrites for the structure and more attention to the history of the story, this could turn into a decent short film.

Well let me first say that when I wrote this I was planning to direct. Also I didn't have the proper software, I do now, I understand what you mean. I am working on a rewrite and am going to post it as a partial screenplay and see what people think. YOU, should check it out. Thanks for posting.

J. Kane Drummond.