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SimplyScripts Screenwriting Discussion Board    Unproduced Screenplay Discussion    Sci Fi and Fantasy Scripts  ›  Compuman Moderators: bert
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  Author    Compuman  (currently 1792 views)
Don
Posted: September 30th, 2007, 1:34pm Report to Moderator
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So, what are you writing?

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Compuman by S. Ramlal - Sci Fi - A student makes a look alike on the computer. After being transported out of the computer, the Compuman wants to kill his maker. And the Compuman chases him, until a young boy makes him realize what he is doing. But then the maker starts chasing the Compuman, to destroy him. 129 pages - pdf, format


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Souter Fell
Posted: October 1st, 2007, 11:12am Report to Moderator
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Sorry but it's pretty unreadable. Grammatical errors. Bad, unspeakable dialogue. No sense of pace. I flipped through and saw it might get better towards the middle (although the part I landed on had the Compuman (horrible name) playing the whole "what are these terms, what do they mean" cliche) but it's just so messy that I can't get there.



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Souter Fell  -  October 1st, 2007, 11:27am
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