All screenplays on the simplyscripts.com and simplyscripts.net domain are copyrighted to their respective authors. All rights reserved. This screenplaymay not be used or reproduced for any purpose including educational purposes without the expressed written permission of the author.
Scarefest episode 4 - Meat Pies by Anthony Hudson (alffy) - Short, Horror - With their exams looming, Gav, Russ and Mozza take a weekend break away in the English countryside. Unfortunately they order far more than they can eat. - pdf, format
Allfy, I'm just gonna come out and say it. Meat Pies is brilliant! It is the "Evil Dead" of short horror scripts.
The story is simple and not very original, but it is so over the top and gory that it doesn't matter. It is also extremely funny. When Gav came face to face with the dead mans dick, I couldn't help but laugh.
The format is great and the charaters are well developed for a short. Their dialog was snappy and flowed well.
When I wasn't laughing, I was being disgusted! The meat pies made me gag. Ooh...
Complaints... I can't think of any. I loved everything about this script.
I loved this script Alffy. Thank you for the great read. 10/10
The title reminds me of that song from Sweeny Todd about Meat Pies...except I barely know how the song goes because I've not seen Sweeny Todd yet.
This story was bloody and fun to read. The plot was unoriginal as Zack mentioned, but the gore and action and funny dialogue made up for it.
There were actually a lot of characters for a 15 pager, and so it was hard for me to keep up with who was who. Like, I didn't know who Jess or Colin was, so when I didn't see that their names were capitalized, I figured they've been mentioned before, but I just didn't know when.
Also, there were a lot of spelling errors that you hafta check up on.
I found this to be more humorous than scary but I have to say that I did enjoy it. There were plenty of nice gross out moments throughout.
I do not think that the characters acted very realistically for what was happening to them, but since I found this more of an over the top gross out comedy it did not bother me.
From the title I knew exactly what was going to happen so there were no real surprises, but still it was a very enjoyable read.
Also I liked the American Werewolf in London tie in with the slaughtered lamb, I thought that was pretty clever.
Really funny and the three lads were very well developed. It reminded me of Peter Jackson's 'Bad Taste' a little, just in the over the top gore and humour. Gotta say I didn't like the end though. Didn't really seem to be any reason for them to stay and cook pies.
I think if you did this as a shortish feature (60/70 pages) you'll be able to get an indie director to film it. Really think that the comedy and gore could make it a bit of a cult film. I think you could have it over a weekend and it takes them a little longer to realise what's going on. It seemed a little quick for the couple from the bus to have been killed and the girl put in a pie.
People have said it isn't original but I can't remember the last horror film I saw with an original idea. There's only so many ways people can get killed isn't there?
It kinda felt like this isn't the sort of genre you're comfortable with, just with it being so funny, but it works so if I was you I'd write more horrors.
Thanks, that's one of my favourite films. Glad you liked the humour and 10 out of 10, wow thanks again mate.
Quoted from zombie sean
The title reminds me of that song from Sweeny Todd about Meat Pies
Strangely I wrote this before I went to see Sweeny Todd then realised the similarity in the pie story but thought what the hell. lol. Oh sorry about the spelling, that was our lasses job so she's now fired!
Quoted from wilbur
Also I liked the American Werewolf in London tie in with the slaughtered lamb, I thought that was pretty clever
Again, I love this film so couldn't resist the oportunity to name drop it in.
It kinda felt like this isn't the sort of genre you're comfortable with, just with it being so funny, but it works so if I was you I'd write more horrors
Strangely most of my shorts are comedies but one and only feature is a horror.
Thanks again guys, I'll try and comment on the other scarefes episodes asap but unfortunately I don't hav the internet at the mo as I've just moved but I'll keep borrowing my mates internet.
Check out my scripts...if you want to, no pressure.
Hey Alffy, just read this one. I agree that it is far from original, but then again, there aren't many things that you can really call original anymore, so no big deal. It reminds me very much of another script I read on here awhile ago...right down to the finger nail in the pie thing. I also agree that having the couple from the Coach (is that supposed to be a bus?) turn out to be already killed and in the pies is kind of ridiculous, but I think you were going for complete ridiculousness and over the topness.
It was a bit funny in places and obviously was intended to be. I personally am not a fan of "funny" horror pieces, but that's just me. I think the humor saved this piece and made it engaging.
Lots of grammr errors and mis-spellings thoughout. It sems like this is a rough draft almost. Most of the characters, other than the 3 guys, just all of a sudden appear in the script and don't seem to have much substance, but again, for what it is, that's probably your intention.
The ending is odd, to say the least. I see you're going for humor here again, but I don't think it quite works the way you wanted it to. Maybe it just didn't work for me though, who knows?
Interesting though to say the least. Up the irons, mate!
This was a nice little short. Like the others have said it was more fun than scary but that's alright. Not much new here, a classic case of being at the wrong place at the wrong time. Some of the Brittish slang went right over my head but I think I got most of it but it was kinda difficult to tell the three guys apart. I think a little physical description of each wouldn't hurt.
All in all a good little funny gore flick that kinda reminded me of my own Every Knee Shall Bow (Double Carnage).
Cheers Rob
Down in the hole / Jesus tries to crack a smile / Beneath another shovel load
I also agree that having the couple from the Coach (is that supposed to be a bus?) turn out to be already killed and in the pies is kind of ridiculous, but I think you were going for complete ridiculousness and over the topness.
A coach is a big bus and yeah I was going for a slightly ridiculous story.
Quoted from dreamscale
Lots of grammr errors and mis-spellings thoughout.
A lot have commented on this but I gave it a good proof read so there can t be too many. I wonder if it is the northern slang that you misinterpret as grammer and spelling errors?
For some reason, I'm going skip the pot pie tonight...Really liked this...Very funny and delivered the gruesome goods in fine manner...The ending was perfect...Liked the English (as in UK) flavor to this; it definitly had that dry British wit about it...Loved the Head's Up line...Good character development of the lads, although the Butcher and Jess were a little hard to keep track off and a little flat-Why do they do what they do? Does it bother them at all?...Very good getting the boys in trouble and creatively getting them out of it because of thier characters...If Mozza wasn't a chef, he may not have come to that conclusion....Theme has been done here before (Double Carnage, I think), but I liked the dark comic slant to the twisted little tale.
Failure is only the opportunity to begin again more intelligently - Dove Chocolate Wrapper
Abberston Village, Are you sure this is not Royston Vassey?
Like others said more a comedy than a horror, but a good one though. I really enjoyed it, was a good laugh. It does for Solyent Greeen what Shaun of the Dead does to Dawn of the Dead. It is the kind of thing I could def seen filmed, something like the comic strip used to make years ago. Yes it is cliched, but things like this are supposed to be cliched are they not?
Really good script, great characters (though agree with the comment about a little more description, would help picture them as different people) and wonderful and funny dialogue.
Not sure I saw too many mistakes, I do not usually do this but Mark did this for me a couple of times in a review and it actually really helped me, hope you don't think I am being picky as I know what it is like, I can read a script a hundred times and just not see what is obvious to someone else, it's weird sometimes!
Quoted Text
A small market square surrounding by local shops
Quoted Text
Gav and the others step down form the coach
Quoted Text
his beard hides hi features
That's all I noticed anyway.
So really well done, I enjoyed reading this very much.
and how when I thought things couldn't get worse, they did. One example: the freezer.
I enjoyed the British accents. Although this has been done before, I think the accents helped to add originality to the script. And I loved the line "Have a day off mate." I think I'll use that one soon. LOL
I can tell you had fun writing this, and really that's all that matters when it is all said, done, and over with, isn't it? When you love what you're doing, it shows.
Cindy
Award winning screenwriter Available screenplays TINA DARLING - 114 page Comedy ONLY OSCAR KNOWS - 99 page Horror A SONG IN MY HEART - 94 page Drama HALLOWEEN GAMES - 105 page Drama
Wow! This was good. One of the best shorts I've read on the site, for sure. I'm going to have to disagree that this wasn't very original. Sure, the formula's been used before but setting a story that usually takes place in the American Midwest in the English countryside was a stroke of brilliance IMO. I think more horror movies need to be set here. The only ones I can think of off the top of my head are American Werewolf In London (I appreciated the reference, BTW) and Straw Dogs (technically not a horror movie). The location wasn't the only change though. There was definitely a healthy batch of British humor here, which I loved. It's like Texas Chainsaw meets Monty Python. I also loved the characters. Even if I like the characters in something like this, it's usually the carnage that offers the appeal but I think your characters really stood out, not because they were funny (which they were) but because no matter how bad things got, they were able to keep their cool. The ending was a bit of a shock as well but appropriate for what you setup and I don't think it's ever been done before so kudos.
I feel like I'm giving a bad review if I'm not unloading a batch of pointers and criticisms but I do think this script was pretty flawless. Definitely in my top ten of best shorts on SS. Anyway, I think I've gushed enough so I'll simply say good job, Alffy. Always a pleasure.