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SimplyScripts Screenwriting Discussion Board    Unproduced Screenplay Discussion    Short Scripts  ›  The Take Home Final Moderators: bert
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  Author    The Take Home Final  (currently 1788 views)
Don
Posted: June 26th, 2008, 5:36pm Report to Moderator
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So, what are you writing?

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The Take Home Final by Robert Gati - Short, Comedy - Even at Princeton University there are slackers, and Gary Klondike is one of the best. Having been on academic probation multiple times, Gary must finish a take home final from one of his bullsh*t Sociology classes, or he faces expulsion. Janet, Gary's girlfriend, sees this moment as the perfect escape clause out of her relationship. She's wanted to dump Gary for a long time, but can't because Gary belongs to Princeton's exclusive Ivy Club, which Janet hopes to join as she is a social climber. It's his goal to finish the final over the weekend, it's her goal to stop him. 31 pages  (view the short at:  http://blip.tv/file/990380 - pdf, format

Update:  This script has been on the boards since July of '07.  It has been filmed.  Watch it here:



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Revision History (1 edits)
Don  -  June 26th, 2008, 6:23pm
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ABennettWriter
Posted: June 27th, 2008, 12:21am Report to Moderator
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So... I've had to force myself to watch the first 3 minutes.

The part where he wakes up is good The professor's speech is a little long. The stuff in the middle (brushing teeth, walking to class) is boring and not needed.

Some of the shots in the classroom were weird. The shot of the ringing cell phone was weird, too. Just the angle.

The main character is annoying. Sometimes you can get away with being annoying, if the guy's charming or sincere, but your guy is lazy and annoying. I don't like him.

I'm sorry, but I'm not watching anymore.
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CindyLKeller
Posted: June 29th, 2008, 4:58pm Report to Moderator
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I agree that the beginning was slow, and kind of hard to get into. I think a lot of it had to do with the actor's delivery, too because I found the lines very funny, I think they could have been pulled off better...
But then again, they aren't professionals...

BUT WAIT!!!

I laughed my butt off at the football player/headless statue scene. I loved it!
I also found the scene in the gym funny, too. There were other funny scenes too, but those are the ones that stick out in my mind.

Oh, and a behind the scenes look at what happens when you send your food back... Know I never will again.

Congrats on getting it produced

Cindy


Award winning screenwriter
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