Cover Band: Don't Stop Believing by Jim Bennett - Comedy - A band plays in a bar on a Wednesday night for no money. A stark reality for most bands these days. But Starship Runner isn't going to take it lying down! Kix, Carl, DJ and Mike set forth to find themselves a manager. Someone who is going to have their best interests at heart. Someone who knows about the business of music and promotion. Or someone who is going to kidnap them. Which is exactly what Gary did. 110 pages - pdf, format

Thanks for putting up my work! It's greatly appreciated!

hey HGC, just finished this. yes,it is funnier than garbage men but it's a different humour. this was great!  it reminded me a lot of the Beatles parody, the rutles, done by eric idle from monty python, in 1978. especially the second half interview stuff!
u have all the classic rock band cliches down pat, and mike's extra wheel was a blast!
i read the comments by your zhura mates and it seems to be a regimented way of doing things. i know they're helping u but too many people could be overloading your way of doing things.
it has the same style as garbage men, so u have found a good method. top work.

Thanks!

HGC,

Here's my take.

Great premise.  I think some scenes need punched up.
Some examples:  1) the rehersals would be a great spot to add more humor and convey more of the characters' quirky sides, 2) it would be funny to see Starship devise a plan to sabotage Flashback...as it seems Starship is the underdog (by the way the exchange of words b/t starship and flahsback are funny), 3) the turd tank scene is funny, but again to punch it up, maybe show the turd on the road being left in the dust.

I think you could explore the conflict b/t Gary and Hedi better.  This has huge potential as I feel they both have extreme views regarding what is best for the band.

One thing I really wanted to see and never happened, was for starship to attempt to act like a rock band (even though the reader knows they're really no more than a popular cover band).  For example, Gary tells them to stop acting nice.  This is a good start but I think you can punch it up a bit.

Nice work!

Thanks guys. I've got this script entered into about 5 contests this year. I'm not sure if I've got a shot at getting out of the first round with this one, but I do know that it's really, really funny. (To me at least.)