The Look of Love by Andrew McCoy (amacca) - Short - No Logline 12 pages - doc, format

This script definitely needs to be longer; your idea should be explored further.  Instead of framing it within a single conversation, why not tell it chronologically, have it be about this lonely guy in the dystopia, leading up to the climactic confrontation rather than starting with it.  By expanding the scope this kernel could be full-length, and by itself it could still be a lot longer than it is now.  But before the end we need to understand what the registrar is, what this online partner thing is (until the end it's not explained that this online partner is unique to Jake), what "social outcast" means, etc.  You need to put in the full dystopia, before you can attack it morally.
    There are minor structure problems.  Sluglines should be all-CAPS, and rarely end in "LATER" - usually just when it's a continuation of the same scene.  You use V.O when you should use O.S.  You write webcam POV at a time when it's not really essential - this should be the director's choice, not in the screenplay.
    I can definitely see potential, and the dystopia is an interesting one, but without more expansion I can't enjoy it yet.  Hope to see this idea properly manifested in the future.