Texas Roundup by Milan Antal - Short, Thriller - 1880 Wild West Bounty hunters come to 1980 Austin,Texas Halloween Night, to help young Prosecutor to solved,not enough evidence loosing cases. 17 pages - pdf, format

Milan,

As I'm wrting this, you have 14 views.  I can assure you, the majority haven't read your... novel.  This is not a script.  It may look like one... but it reads like a novel.

I'll forego all the grammical errors.

Your formatting is off the charts.  Particularly, your SLUGLINES.  Their all wrong, written backwards.

AUSTIN TEXAS 1980 HALLOWEEN-EXT...  I don't care what anyone say's this is not correct.

EXT.  AUSTIN, TEXAS 1980 HALLOWEEN - DAY... correct.  

Scripts are written in "present tense", not "past tense."

Too many to go over...

You have  6, 7 lines of paragraphs.  It's all jumbled together which makes it very hard to read.  It also makes no sense.  Try to keep them to no more then four lines.

Take this...

Page #9, I stopped here by the way.

In just a few minutes the bouty hunters approach the area, split up to surround the house.  Michael was home, having a small party in pool area with his best friends.  

I'd get rid of IN JUST A FEW MINUTES.  How do we know Michael was having a pool party?  You need to show us.  I'd takeout the last line and re-do it.  

Try this...

EXT.  MICHAEL'S HOME - NIGHT

Bounty hunters surround the house.   Then go from there.

Your script is really poorly written, PERIOD.  I'm sure you have a good story to tell but the reality is... no one is going to read this.  I hope some do though to give you more honest feedback.  Quite frankly, you need it.

You have alot of work to do.  I'd suggest you read a few scripts on here.  

Good Luck

Ghostwriter22