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Some Candy Talkin' by Alexander Hay - Drama - A film editor spots a face in a foreign crowd- a missing friend who left on the run after ripping everyone off. A reward to locate the friend– then kill him - results in a re-bonding, redemption and a change of destiny. 123 pages - pdf, format
Whilst we start with an interior, the first footage we see is external (previously filmed). A travel presenter walks thru’ an exotic market in a foreign country. He speaks to camera(any dialogue)- suddenly the film rewinds at speed- repeats- moving slower- one frame at a time- without sound. PULL BACK to reveal MARK- at an Avid editor- staring hard at the screen. He moves the footage on a frame- uses a magnifying-glass to peer closer- rolling the frame back and forth. He calls a friend- DES- over. MARK Des!. Take a look, will you?
Phew. Where to start:
Formatting: No need to under line slugs or peoples names.
Whilst we start with an interior, the first footage we see is external (previously filmed). ? ? ? You need to show us that. The first scene should be EXT. PLACE -TIME
This scene needs alot of tidying up. You don't cap your characters or give them a description.
I totally agree with the above. I couldn't get past the formatting. Also, it would be helpful if we knew what the guy noticed in the film (hippie stall holder) before he was mesmerized by it. Found it a little confusing.
Get the software and we can talk.
Your comments welcome on: GOD GETS FIRED. Comedy, 89 pages. Humans are such a failure that God loses his job. Worse, his ex-wife is appointed to oversee Earth’s destruction. Luckily, God has a plan…but it’s not about saving us. It’s about winning her back.