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SimplyScripts Screenwriting Discussion Board    Unproduced Screenplay Discussion    Short Scripts  ›  Dirty Cop Greed Moderators: bert
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  Author    Dirty Cop Greed  (currently 1042 views)
Don
Posted: March 15th, 2013, 3:40pm Report to Moderator
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So, what are you writing?

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Dirty Cop Greed by Simon K. Parker - Short - The new partner of a long time dirty cop will have to try all he can to try and put a stop to him. - pdf, format


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J.S.
Posted: March 15th, 2013, 10:08pm Report to Moderator
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Simon,

I call already tell you that the first page needs to be trimmed down. I don't understand why it was necessary to go through all of that stuff. Sorry to say I wasn't engaged at all.

-J.S.
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13thChamber
Posted: March 28th, 2013, 5:03am Report to Moderator
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Pretty good. Some of the dialogue was on the nose, you told at times, rather than show. But, not too bad for a "training day" like story.


13th
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Forgive
Posted: March 29th, 2013, 6:44pm Report to Moderator
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Let The Sky Fall

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This guy never appears on the boards - it's pointless giving him feedback.
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