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SimplyScripts Screenwriting Discussion Board    Unproduced Screenplay Discussion    Short Comedy Scripts  ›  Blink Principal
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  Author    Blink Principal  (currently 840 views)
Don
Posted: February 7th, 2018, 10:20am Report to Moderator
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So, what are you writing?

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Blink Principal by Michael Taylor - Short, Comedy - A classroom prank goes wrong. 5 pages - pdf, format

Writer interested in feedback on this work



Visit SimplyScripts.com for what is new on the site.

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eldave1
Posted: February 10th, 2018, 9:00pm Report to Moderator
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Micheal:

This:


Quoted Text
INT. AMERICAN HIGH SCHOOL CLASSROOM - DAY

The camera zooms out from an American flag to show an
average American suburban classroom. The teacher and
students are dressed in Nazi uniforms. The kids are all
talking and giggling with one another before the class
begins. The teacher is writing on the board.
The bell rings, causing the students to quiet down and face
forward.


Has several basic problems. Characters are not properly introduced (in CAPS and described). Key sounds not capped and written passively - e.g., The Teacher is writing - reads better as - The Teacher writes.



My Scripts can all be seen here:

http://dlambertson.wix.com/scripts
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MikeCashman
Posted: May 22nd, 2020, 12:57pm Report to Moderator
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This script did nothing for me.  I even read it twice, but I just do not get the "JOKE".  There isn't any comedy here.  And in many ways this script is actually unrealistic.  There would never be a class that would go to that extreme to pull a joke on a new student.  So this may be original, it just doesn't hit a homerun.  

Sorry.  I will pass on this one.
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