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Aborting Love by Fausto Lucignani - Short, Sci Fi, Rom-Com - In a world where humanoid robots coexist with human beings, a loveless, middle-aged woman seeks affection from her bionic house assistant. 6 pages
production: Shoestring production. One location, two actors and some make-up. - pdf, format
This is good, an easy read. The only thing I would like to see in it is more humor since it's a rom com..I don't normally like getting ideas given to me, so I don't want to give you ideas, but it would be funny if she goes to reach for him in her excitement and knocks a drink over him, causing him to malfunction...
"Turn that off, our friend has just been killed in a fatal sunlight accident!"....
Hi Kirsten, thank you very much for reading my script. Please don't worry about giving me your ideas/suggestions. I really appreciate your contribution. The problem (minor) is that it's difficult to insert humor into a story, I thought the story itself was kind of humorous. I would try to add some gags to make the story more comic. A difficult task, though. All my best, Fausto
Yeah it is a funny story and original, you can go crazy with funny, but it is hard to keep it short...and it's hard to keep it from seeming like a skit.... hence the difficulty. I personally don't think short comedies work well because of this. making it a 25 minute episode in a series works. Any comedies I've written play like skits, really full on ones..
I just keep seeing the robot malfunctioning because she does something stupid, something that can be linked to her still being alone...??
Anyways good luck with it.
"Turn that off, our friend has just been killed in a fatal sunlight accident!"....
Hi Kirsten, you are 100% correct, a short movie cannot be really funny. There is no time to develop hilarious situations. I appreciate your suggestion, make the woman do something stupid/funny for immediate results. I'll try that. Thank you very much. My best, Fausto