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SimplyScripts Screenwriting Discussion Board  /  Drama Scripts  /  The Forward Thinking Perspective
Posted by: Don, June 9th, 2004, 12:14pm
The Forward Thinking Perspective by MomboMan - Drama - Controversial!! If you are one who believes civil rights/integration is the 'Will of God' I would strongly suggest you do NOT read it.  - doc format.


Script removed by request

-Don
Posted by: Reed Enwright, June 9th, 2004, 10:39pm; Reply: 1
I don't plan to read it, and I don't believe in the 'Will of God', but civil rights and integration are just common sense. I've never read a 'hate screenplay' but I imagine that this is such a thing.

What is this screenplay about? A logline or a short synopsis would be much more useful than just a warning.
Posted by: MomboMan, June 10th, 2004, 1:25pm; Reply: 2
Nazi storm troopers do make an appearance...as do hooded KKK’s.  :X

Reed, the script is not about hate, rather, it is about the ‘right ‘ to think.

Integration is an experiment. All experiments should be open for debate, but the funny, or strange thing is that when the subject of integration is broached, particularly among whites, we clam up. We become literally consumed with guilt, don’t we? Remember the Sienfeld episode where Elaine thinks she’s dating a black? A half ’n’ half, as George called him... And as they discuss whether he is really black, finally George blurts out “ I don’t think we should be talking about this.” Why? Because we’ve been taught - programmed -  to feel uncomfortable when the subject of race is brought up. i.e. Guilt.

I’ve only probed the very outer edges of the Forward Thinking Perspective with this script. I didn’t want to appear to be preaching… As with any experiment, there are consequences to this integration system... launched in 1964. That is the main point I wanted to drive home.
I hope I was successful.
Posted by: Old Time Wesley, June 10th, 2004, 10:14pm; Reply: 3
American History X is a hate screenplay but the message is so strong you just don't care anymore, it is one of the best genres that everyone is afraid to touch on because of racial slurs and our society today

If this has a message and a story I'll read it
Posted by: Reed Enwright, June 11th, 2004, 5:28am; Reply: 4
Wesley, American History X was not a 'hate screenplay' but rather a screenplay about hate. 'The Forward Thinking Perspective' (which I suspect is neither forward nor thinking) seems suspiciously anti-civil rights (and that's just based on what's he's stated about the script, not on the script itself). If MomboMan is against integration, then I assume he is in favor of segregation. And that's just Backward.

Like I said, I won't be reading it. But I hope you, or somebody else, does. I hope I'm wrong.

MomboMan, if I'm wrong about you're point-of-view, I apologize. And if somebody reads your script and tells me I was barking up the wrong tree, I will glady read it.

Has anybody read it?

Posted by: Old Time Wesley, June 11th, 2004, 1:16pm; Reply: 5
Okay for now I've finished 10 pages or so and I do not see this going anywhere, I hope it does but that warning made me expect more than what I've gotten so far

The characters don't get much set up, Michael had his name in brackets, Michael who is he and why didn't you add in his description

It takes too long for me to get to where it should have been 5 pages ago, you didn't set up the characters very well and so far they seem to smart for there own good

The dialogue is great and I will continue reading in hopes it will pick up

ps. What year does this story take place?
Posted by: MomboMan, June 11th, 2004, 4:41pm; Reply: 6
Wesley, thanks for reading and giving your opinion... And Michael is the Editor-in-Chief. I did add a line to the script to make that more apparent.  THANKS

And as for the "the year," if you re-read the opening dialogue, you'll see... hint: "40 years is not passing the test of time."  

This is not an action-packed thriller. No one is killed, raped, bludgeoned, etc.  The script does border on the intellectual side.

Here is a short synopses:

Julie, a student reporter, contrives a scheme to get a “juicy story” out of her political science professor.  She believes, with a one-on-one interview, she can get him to say something about civil rights/integration that she can nail him on – we all know it only takes the utterance of ONE wrong word, and POW! Right? By treachery and deceit she does get the professor to open up. However, after the interview she finds she doesn’t have the “juicy “stuff she thought she would get. Desperate though to make a front-page story out of this interview, she decides to play with his meaning of his words... by changing the context.  

When the paper hits the stands, unwittingly, Juilie has set into motion a chain of events that turns the professor’s life into complete and irrevocably turmoil.
Posted by: Old Time Wesley, June 12th, 2004, 4:44pm; Reply: 7
Now if that would have been the brief summary from the beginning it would have made more sence, I'm further than I was when I posted that and have read basically everything in your summary

For me it goes along to fast for a 100 plus page screenplay you do have the whole story in the first 23 pages and while I am going to read on I'd expect at least a heated confrontation between the teacher and Julie
Posted by: lesleyjl21, June 14th, 2004, 2:49am; Reply: 8
I was intrigued by the title alone.  I don't know, maybe I'll check this out.  Quite an interesting debate though if I may say so.
Posted by: MomboMan, June 14th, 2004, 8:12pm; Reply: 9
Lesley21, I would like hear a female "perspective" on the script :)

I just submitted an updated version...minor changes only.

Wesley, t was "short" synopses...Keep reading, please.

Any feedback is welcomed...

Posted by: dangeroussamurai, June 24th, 2004, 7:50pm; Reply: 10
The title to this sounds like one for an evil-communist 50s educational film! BUT, thats beside the point. I did read part(s) of this and, well----aside from the bold font and crazy random "bad stuff" in it, well, just seems like you were trying to out do yourself (and everyone else) with bad stuff. huh. uh, yea, thats my take on it.
Posted by: MomboMan, June 24th, 2004, 11:38pm; Reply: 11
dangerous samurai,

Funny post... I mean "bad stuff"? LOL

I did a search here for ANYTHING in which you might have wrote. Just one thing, anything, SOMETHING... Well, not surprising, I FOUND NOT ONE THING. Hmmmm

If I’m wrong, then kindly point it out to me. I’d love to read pages 6 and 13 and give you my ‘informed’ thoughts about it.

Just what “part(s) of this” did you read? Page 2, 8, 23 and 80?

Anyhow, I don’t hv any problem with constructive criticism… But I would prefer it from someone who has actually 'wrote' something, ANYTHING
just one thing to demonstrate they have the ability to develope a plot, characters, dialogue, etc....
Posted by: dangeroussamurai, June 25th, 2004, 10:10am; Reply: 12
A. My ideas are too freakin good too post on any 'website'. I dont trust people. I write a LOT. So much, I usually dont even type stuff up. I hand write most of my ideas, and I usually resort to novels, because those are actually easier to do than scripts, I think. But, yeah, I can write a pretty badass script. I think. I have a pretty badass script, its just not up yet. I think.

B. I suck at constructive critisism (did I spell that right?)

C. I was just practicing

D. (How long is this?) I didnt like what I read BUT I will read the WHOLE THING again. THEN I'll tell you what I think.

E. BUT, nor did I like the incorrect format

F. I'm just trying to be funny here. Funny AND sort of serious.

G.Thats all. Sorry if I pissed you off.

H. Really, thats it.

I. Why are you still reading this?
Posted by: MomboMan, June 25th, 2004, 11:41am; Reply: 13
dangerous samurai,

I had nothing to do with the way the format turned out.

I have no idea how some of the font got changed form 12pt to 10 point. Here is my suggestion: Down load script, copy to WORD. Then hit EDIT, then 'Select All,' then New Courier, '12pt, and then Bold. It will then come out proper, even the pagination.

Again, don't know what happened in the uploading process.
Posted by: mikehill1215, June 25th, 2004, 12:12pm; Reply: 14
I suggest that from now on...Anytime a writer has a set of 'rules' for feedback they should be posted right off.  For instance, if you ask for ANY feedback then tell the perosn that gives it to you - Oh, sorry I don't want YOUR feedback because you don't have anything posted here.  Why not just state that you only want feedback from those who have work posted in the beginning of the thread? Save us all some time.  Funny note-  seems this is only a problem with critical feedback-  praise never seems to come under question.
Posted by: dangeroussamurai, June 25th, 2004, 12:35pm; Reply: 15
MomboMan, I understand with the font deal. Okay.

and, Mikehill, I totally agree. Even if someone doesnt like feedback, they need to accept it for what it is. Many people will have different takes on something, whether good or bad, or whether their reason makes any sense. You just gotta deal with it.
Posted by: MomboMan, June 25th, 2004, 7:16pm; Reply: 16
Mikehill,
Again, I have no problem with ‘constructive’ criticism/ feedback. However, D.Samurai’s post was not constructive criticism/ feedback. It was just plain nonsense.

If you re-read his post, you will find that there are no reasons given for his “bad stuff” remark.  A conclusion he seems to have drawn from reading only a few (couple?) pages…  Hardly enough to draw a conclusion like he did.
So I think that begs the question: Why the post?

As to my comment about actually have written “something, anything,” I think a person can better appreciate the time and effort that goes into actually writing a script if they have wrote one.

If someone doesn't like a posted script here then by all means say so. BUT, be kind enough to include reason(s) why you didn't like the script. That shouldn't be TOO MUCH to ask for...Or, just don't post at all.
Posted by: mikehill1215, June 26th, 2004, 1:39am; Reply: 17

Quoted Text
As to my comment about actually have written “something, anything,” I think a person can better appreciate the time and effort that goes into actually writing a script if they have wrote one.


Point well taken. I can certainly smypathize with those sentiments.  Maybe it's best to look at critique the same way we look at screenplays.  Not everyone has the talent or even the desire to be a master of the craft. Sometimes screenplays are of poor quality and sometimes they're great, but in each one there's some good.  For me it's the same with critique,  even in the most scathing or seemingly useless feedback, I can usually find something that I can agree wtih or at least see the reviewers point.  
Posted by: baltis (Guest), June 28th, 2004, 1:58am; Reply: 18
I agree with MIKE... for once... ;)

Anyway, I do like to have a compare and compare type of set up for me though. It's always good to be able to actually read what THIS GUY, "who is bashing your work to hell and back" actually has to compare against.

I for one love feedback -- good, bad whatever... any feedback is good... cause they took the time to post on your thread about your screenplay and over your script -- that they could have actually read cover to cover.

That's a cool feeling in my book.

As for your off format... I know what you mean... all my screenplays get *** ****ed in this department from the SOPHOCLES to word pad transfer.

anyway, yeah I read your screenplay to about page 30 and started reading the BATMAN screenplay up in ACTION. I'm going back to this one to finish it up though, so don't worry... I'll post my final thoughts then.

P.S. Check out the incredible BATMAN screenplay on the ACTION boards... wow! It is so well writen, so well dreamed up you'll swear your reading a comic book without the actuall pictures in front of you.
Posted by: dangeroussamurai, June 28th, 2004, 8:42am; Reply: 19
Hey, am I THE GUY? not cool......
Posted by: baltis (Guest), June 28th, 2004, 1:42pm; Reply: 20
No I was just saying... in a round about way... not you persay.

I've talked with you several times and even heard out one of your idea's... sounds really good, I can't wait to read some of your stuff.

This wasn't a poke at you or even in your general direction.
Posted by: dangeroussamurai, June 28th, 2004, 2:21pm; Reply: 21
oh. Yay.
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