How do you write a montage?  I've never really looked into that.  Do you say what happens in the montage, or do you plan it out according with the music, or what?

I seen it in a screenplay I was reading and they just had like INT. House - Montage - Night or something along them lines

than underneath they had everything that happened, I don't remember exactly who it was

thanks

If I was you I'd send a pm to someone who knows format well and than they can help you out even more, I also wrote a montage sequence in my script that's unreleased the same way I seen it done

like who?

I began The Burnout with a montage.  You have to describe each image separately and insert a space between each image.  Don't forget that a page of script averages a minute on the screen.  The spaces provide pacing in the story.


Phil

Yeah that's who I seen it from, when I opened The Burnout I seen a montage sequence

I should have remembered but I guess I didn't

I used a montage in episode 18 of BANANA CHAN.  I think it's important to describe generally what the scenes entail without getting into complete detail about the sequence in which those scenes are arranged, because that's up to the editor.

If I change location, like from otside to inside a house, do I have to do a new like "INT. HOUSE--MONTAGE--DAY" or do I just keep going with the spaces and stuff?

Quoted from Higgonaitor If I change location, like from otside to inside a house, do I have to do a new like "INT. HOUSE--MONTAGE--DAY" or do I just keep going with the spaces and stuff?

Don´t use slugs within a montage.

Check this link (scroll down) to see how it´s done: http://www.screenwriting.info/13.php

Here's a MONTAGE Sequence from CINEMA PARADISO shooting script..

It's the final scene when all the cuts from all the films seen in the Italian community cinema are edited and put together in a montage for the main character, SALVATORE, to see.. This is the grand finale of this movie.. Notice there is no mention of MONTAGE, it is simply described in the screenplay as a sentence or paragraph.. This would be a good way of doing this in a SPEC SCRIPT format..

ROME. STUDIO VIEWING-ROOM. INT. DAY

               ...SALVATORE'S hands giving a STUDIO PROJECTIONIST the rusty
               metal can left him by ALFREDO.

                                   SALVATORE
                         Please check the splices. As soon
                         as you're ready you can start.

                                   PROJECTIONIST
                         OK. Congratulations on your film.
                         It's terrific.

                                   SALVATORE
                         Thanks.

               A COLLEAGUE of SALVATORE comes up behind him.

                                   SALVATORE (CONT'D)
                         Well?

                                   COLLEAGUE
                         The distributor is opening up the
                         film earlier. The press conference
                         is in the afternoon. The actors
                         will also be there, the producer,
                         just about everyone.

               An ASSISTANT comes up to them.

                                   ASSISTANT
                         The official notification of the
                         award just came out, but we've
                         already received a mountain of
                         telegrams. Aren't you happy?

                                   SALVATORE
                         It's all right. We'll talk about it
                         later.

               SALVATORE walks off towards the viewing theatre.

               SALVATORE is by himself in the small viewing theatre. Now the
               lights go down. The beam of light shines out of the little
               square hole of the projection booth and the screen lights up.
               A number trailer goes by and then SALVATORE sees the first
               shots.

               A start of intense amazement and joy suddenly runs through
               him, astounds him, delights him. It's the best piece of film
               he has ever seen...

               It consists of all the kisses ALFREDO cut out of the films
               and kept for him, when he was a little boy.
               They have been spliced together, one , after the other, at
               random, same of them even upside down. And yet it looks like
               a first- rate editing job.

               In rapid sequence the passionate kisses between actors and
               actresses, names famous and names unknown in the history of
               movies. Greta Garbo, Gary Cooper, Alida Valii, Rudolph
               Valentino, Ingrid Bergman, Clark Gable, Anna Magnani,
               Humphrey Bogart, Marlene Dietrich, Amedeo Nazzari, Luisa
               Ferida, Vittorio De Sica, Rita Hayworth, Tyrone Power, Doris
               Durante, Massimo Gironi, Marta Abba, Fred Astaire and Ginger
               Rogers, Assia Noris...

               A whole movie season summed up in a few fragments, a few
               seconds. A bizarre, poignant, melancholy parade.

               SALVATORE is overwhelmed, moved to tears. It is the most
               profound act of love he has ever seen. He laughs as tears
               shine in his eyes. Up on the screen, another kiss, the last
               kiss marking the happy ending of a film. And the age-old
               words appear 'THE END'.

I use the good old semi-colon. Whether this is right or not, you know what, I'm the only one who's going to say.

Freak sits at his computer; opens up Firefox; types in http://www.simplyscripts.com; clicks on message boards;posts.

Quoted from R.E._Freak I use the good old semi-colon. Whether this is right or not, you know what, I'm the only one who's going to say. Freak sits at his computer; opens up Firefox; types in http://www.simplyscripts.com; clicks on message boards;posts.

I don't understand...

Quoted from George Willson I don't understand...

Each action or description is seperated from the others by a semi-colon.

I write montages like this...

Montage: Description 1; description 2; description 3.

OIC.

Here's the standard on it via the Screenwriter's Bible.

A Montage is a sequence of brief shots expressing the same or similar idea, such as a passage of time, or a stream of consciousness. Here's a common format:

MONTAGE - SUZY AND BILL HAVE FUN TOGETHER

-- They run along the beach. Suzy raises her countenance against the ocean spray.

-- They bicycle through a park.

-- Bill buys Suzy ice cream at a small stand. She stuffs it into his face. The patrons chuckle.

And, of course, you would end the montage with BACK TO SCENE or END MONTAGE or a new master scene heading. It's okay to include dialogue in a Montage, but generally the focus is on the beats of action.

In a very short Montage, you can simply write the Montage in paragraph form beginning with the word MONTAGE followed by a colon and the narrative description (or even semi-colons, right R.E.?)

Some studios and productions companies prefer a Montage format that lists location, then action.

MONTAGE - SUZY AND BILL HAVE FUN TOGETHER

-- A beach - They race across the sand. Suzy raises her countenance against the ocean spray.

-- A park - They bicycle down meandering paths.

-- An ice cream stand - Bill buys Suzy an ice cream cone. She stuffs it into his face. The patrons chuckle.

This style can also be used with the SERIES OF SHOTS.

Similar to the MONTAGE is the SERIES OF SHOTS, consisting of quick shots that tell a story. They lead to some dramatic resolution or dramatic action, whereas a MONTAGE focuses on a single concept. Here's an example of how to format the SERIES OF SHOTS.

SERIES OF SHOTS

A) The classroom spins.

B) The professor, in a panic, jabs the computer tab key.

C) He tosses the computer out the window.

D) He peers out the window, clutching his little dog.

E) Dean Zelda Zack rides up on her swagger stick, hurls the computer back at him, and CACKLES.

BACK TO SCENE

The MONTAGE is used more than the SERIES OF SHOTS. Even when the sequence is a true SERIES OF SHOTS, the MONTAGE format is often used. Sometimes the heading MONTAGE is used and then the shots are numbered exactly like the SERIES OF SHOTS example above. The rules are fluid here, and the terms are often used interchangably. Use both devices sparingly.

Generally, a MONTAGE in the script is scored to music in the movie. For example, the MONTAGE above of Suzy and Bill could be lengthened to be accompanied by a love song -- the MONTAGE concept would be "falling in love." The training MONTAGE from ROCKY is another example. Thus, the word MONTAGE often means: put the hit song here. Now, don't you indicate the musical selection you'd prefer. In fact, don't refer to music at all. That's someone else's job.

Thanks to Dave Trottier...

Okay, so which one of these should I use?  What george says and what Mr. Z say are pretty simple, but then I was looking at The Burnout, and it has a logline, and R.E. Freaks semi-colon....Which one of these should I use?

It all depends on context. Write out what you have, and we'll see what works best.

If I wanted to do like...a montage of scenes covering a group of people walking across a desert or something, how would I go about doing that?

Like, I'd show the people walking across in one shot, and then the people walking later on that day in another shot, all in one little sequence?

-Chris

You could break up the walking with any dialogue or action?  

Another way is:

EXT.  DESERT - MONTAGE

John leads the group across the desert.

Beth drinks water from a canteen.

Mike looks at his watch.  12:30.

Vultures circle group.

Bob falls face first in the sand.

END MONTAGE.



Phil

I guess my question really was: "How do I go about showing that the location changes in a montage? Like "Lord of the Rings" style montage where we see our heroes running over a grass plain and then cut to them running through a valley and then cut to a wide shot of them running across the horizon...

You could use MATCH CUT:  

That's a cut that almost makes the next shot instantaneous.

For example:

EXT. CITY - DAY

Joe and Jill run through the city at top speed.

                                                                    MATCH CUT TO:

EXT. DIRT ROAD - DAY

Joe an Jill are now running along a dirt road outside of the city

                                                                    MATCH CUT TO:

EXT. MOUTAIN PASS - DAY

Joe and Jill are now climbing up a mountain.  


That's a very bland example but I have seen that a couple of times, especially in Wachowski screenplays and it seems like that's what you are trying to do.  

That's exactly what I'm trying to do. Thanks, Guy.

I'm not sure Guy's example is the correct use of 'match cut'.

I'd use MATCH CUT sparingly in a spec script and I wouldn't use it to show passage of time given its definition.

"Technical term for when a director cuts from one scene to a totally different one, but has objects in the two scenes "matched," so that they occupy the same place in the shot's frame."

For example.

A ferris wheel turns in the sunlight.

                                                               MATCH CUT TO:
A roulette wheel spins.

I'd say Phil's example is the way to go. You don't want to step on the director's toes.

Yeah, or like in FINAL DESTINATION 3 with those two girls who burn to death in sunbeds:

The two sunbeds are burnt to a crisp, flames licking the edges.

                                                                                        MATCH CUT TO:

Two COFFINS -- waiting to go six feet under.

Are you supposed to use them in a spec script though? It's an editing technique, and therefore isn't it up to the director and editor how the cuts from scene to scene are presented?

Don't say MATCH CUT ever. I think it's considered a bit ignorant and a bit arrogant.  Instead, let a match cut be implied by just stating the images one after another.  If it's really a good match cut you'll be able to tell that's the transition intended.

If a write a montage centered only on one person, does it get repetitive writing "he" about fifteen times? Or should I write out his names at random times to keep it interesting?

Write his name.  At least at the beginning of every new shot in the montage.  It will flow much smoother that way.  

I personally find repetitive and tyiring when many lines in a script start with the same name, be it a montage or whatever scene. Like for example:

INT. KITCHEN - DAY

John opens the fridge and looks inside.

John grabs the milk.

John pours the milk into an empty glass.

John drinks the milk.

Looks dumb, doesn't it? The example below flows much better, IMO.

INT. KITCHEN - DAY

John opens the fridge and looks inside.

He grabs the milk.

Pours the milk into an empty glass.

He drinks the milk.

If your montage is about the same character, mention his name only in the first line. After that, it's redundant.

You could also do this:

INT. KITCHEN - DAY

John opens the fridge and looks inside. Grabs the milk. Pours the milk into an empty glass. Drinks the milk.

However, this isn't a montage. For a montage, the same basic idea can be used, but the point is that it has to be clear.

MONTAGE

A) John bungy-jumps off a bridge.

B) He parasails.

C) Writes an endless stream of lines on a form document with a badly formatted script next to him. Anger is etched on his face.

D) Bounces on a trampoline.

E) Vomits into a toilet.

END MONTAGE

Aside from the sentence fragmentation, I agree with George.  But in a montage it makes sense to use his name again each time, as they're seperate scenes.

One scene should be:  Geoge opens the refrigirator and looks inside.  He grabs the milk, and pours it into an empty glass.  He then drinks the milk.

A montage should be:

A)  John bungy-jumps off a cliff.

B)  John parasails

C)  John writes an endless stream of lines on a form document with a badly formatted script next to him. Anger is etched on his face.

etc.

I wouldn't call the breakfast scenario, here, a montage, but a regular sequence.  Montages should consist of disjointed events with some sort of thread connecting them.

In regards to using the character's name, or a pronoun, I'd use the character's name the first time and the pronoun after that if he/she is the only character involved.


Phil

Just wanted to add a clarification to my original post. The example I provided isn't -as other posters noted- a montage. It wasn't meant to be. I picked a regular scene because I thought the name repetition would look more annoying in it than in a montage, and it would fit better to explain my point.

I thought it would be obvious I wasn't talking about a montage, but maybe I didn't choose the right words in my previous post. So, my appologies if said post generated any confusion.

I stand by my original advice to the original poster: Whether you're writing a montage or a regular scene, when only one character is involved don't start every sentence with his/her name. The scene will look repetitive and poorly worded.

But are you using the "MONTAGE" correctly?  I'd, maybe, go for a "SERIES OF SHOTS" it's just as effective, if not more.

Because more often than not I see people using MONTAGE where they don't even need to be.  

Right.  SERIES OF SHOTS is more appropriate

Mention the Name once and then starts with verbs

-- takes the...

-- runs to...

-- cradles the...

Seems a little more interesting, don' you think?

Quoted from Balt But are you using the "MONTAGE" correctly?  I'd, maybe, go for a "SERIES OF SHOTS" it's just as effective, if not more. Because more often than not I see people using MONTAGE where they don't even need to be.

The Burnout opens with a montage, a series of unrelated shots that just set up the general scene of the story.

Writing all the steps of John painting his house is not a montage, but a sequence of events.


Phil

Is there a limit to how many scenes can be used in a montage? Also, what is the average length of time for a montage? Finally, can a whole scene be a montage, or only a part of it?

Thanks.

A montage is a short collection of scenes that tell a long story in a short amount of time. A montage can be as long or as short as it needs to be. There's no limit there. What you'll want to watch out for is not to make it any longer than it needs to be. Consider why you need to do a montage as opposed to playing it out in scenes. These are typically done when lovers meet and we want them to fall in love quickly to move the story along, or think Mission: Impossible when the team is preparing their gadgets and such. It usually convers a mundane, but important, plot point in the quickest manner possible.

A montage can be a scene by itself or a portion of a larger scene. It all depends on what you're telling. I've seen both.

Thanks George for your help on and off he forum with this question.  ;D

Alright i wrote my montage out, its 3 pages long though. I read the montage for rocky it's less then half'a page.
How did you create your own montage(maybe it can give me some insight on how to fix my own).

Soldier,

Can you copy and paste it into here?  Might make it easier for some of us to take a crack at condensing it.

I wrote a montage in my OWC western short - "Miss Pearly May's Homemade Fudge" -

Script thread - http://www.simplyscripts.net/cgi-bin/Blah/Blah.pl?m-1137886660/

scroll to the end of the script - http://www.simplyscripts.com/scripts/FUDGESCRIPT.rtf

Hope that helps!!

Andy x

Quoted from Soldier Alright i wrote my montage out, its 3 pages long though. I read the montage for rocky it's less then half'a page. How did you create your own montage(maybe it can give me some insight on how to fix my own).

A montage should consist of several different shots with some theme to it.  The Burnout opens with a montage of New York City, starting with the touristy area and quickly moving to the 'darker side' of the city.

A three page montage is way too long.


Phil

I think montages are longer then they are written, because they are written vagueley and on screen they are carried out longer. The minute per page rule doesn't apply to montages.

I'll post my montage, here is thebackround information.
my story is about child soldiers and how they are produced for war purposes. It takes place in the future. Remo is the main character of the story. In the montage i want to illustrate two things. 1. The pasage of time, the routine daily life of child soldiers. 2. That Remo is exceptionally gifted in the art of war.

FAST PACED MONTAGE CONSISTING OF SEVERAL DAYS OF OPS

CUT TO:

EXT. DESERT, IN TOWN - Day
In a hellish battlezone the air is thick with gunpowder, sand and debree collison.

Whole squad((except Remo)is laying down fire at enemey soldiers. Up above the firefight Remo lays on a rooftop, eye through his sight. The laser of the weapon pointed at enemey soldiers, laser moving from enemey to enemey. Each time his gun recoiled, one died. It was clear Remo was a leading factor in this battle, he's facial exspression is calm, stern completley unchanged as if he was target practicing.
TIME CUT TO:
EXT. DESERT, BATTLE SCENE URBAN AREA - Day
Entire child squad equally next to each other, each battle prone, awaiting orders. Behind them stood Seargent Rouger. Incoming fire, richocheting bullets, added to the hellishness of the scene.

Rouger
(Points to two) You two move out to left flank (points to another) you right flank
(points to Remo)You search and destroy, the rest form
a defensive formation.

Immediatley the entire flock breaks apart. Remo rushes down an alley, behind a corner an enemey emerges.
BANG
Enemey go's down, Remo continues to move his pace unchanged. Remo turns another corner, Another enemey
BANG
Shot down from behind, he falls to his knees. Remo amerges from the alley into a vast open battle zone inbetwen the building complex's. Opposing Remo across from a median of pavement, three opposing soldiers are laying down fire to two of Remo's comrade soldiers.
The enemy soldiers have their backs faced to Remo unaware of his presence. Remo releases a brief burst of fire, ENEMEY#1 falls. ENEMEY#2, ENEMEY#3 turn around releasing fire at Remo(turning their backs to the other 2 child soldiers)Remo immediatley takes cover, dodging the fire.
ZACH and CHILDSOLDIER2 Release a furry of ammunition at the enemies. Enemey 2 drops.
Remo dives out from cover, picking out the final enemey with a precise shot.

TIME CUT TO:

INT. BUILDING

Remo
Arrrrhhhhhh!!!( charges enemeies point blank holding the trigger down from his automatic, killing four enemeies).

EXT. A ENEMEY BASE -
TIME CUT TO:
Remo planting an exsplosive against left side of building, on the right side of building child soldier Zach plants an exsplosive. Each run from the building.
CUT TO:

Remo and Zach running both next to each other, shortly behind them the building explodes from the side, and the rest of it implodes in a dust storm.

TIME CUT TO:



EXT. DESERT WARZONE
In a clearer more open setting

Remo has his back pressed against a grimy wall. He's breathing hard panting, palms against the wall. Next to him Zach, ChildSoldier#2, CHILDSOLDIER#3, and Seargent Rouger.

Rouger
(points at Remo, remote in hand)                              
Take it out

Remo nods, Zach smoothly passes' Remo a bright neon blinking device. Remo swings out from behind the wall into a open street, holding gaurded military posture. Moving down the center of the street is a large green tank moving down it.

Remo takes off charging down the street at an incredible speed, headed toward the tank. As Remo approaches the tank he fluidly ducks underneath the barrel, places the tip of his foot against the tank's armor, and propels his body up ontop of the tank. Throws the bright device inside of the cockpit, without breaking motion he hops off, running down the street.

Rouger who just watched this flicks a button on the remote in hand.
The tank explodes from inside. Shards of burnt torn metal flying in all directions.
Remo jogs back to his squad, face calm, no exspression.
He has no feeling, he has no opionon. This is what he doe's because he was raised to do it. This is all he knows.

Alright i just edited it, so it's bareable to read now.
However it's still 2 pages long, is that to long. Any clues on how to shorten it.

Just glancing over it, Id say that you don't need to shorten it since it's not really a montage.  It just looks like more of the script.  Here's the montage example from the Screenwriter's Bible

MONTAGE - BILL AND SUZY HAVE FUN TOGETHER

-- They run along the beach.  Suzy raises her countenance against the ocean spray.

-- They bicycle through a park.

-- Bill buys Suzy ice cream at a small stand.  She stuffs it into his face.  The patrons chuckle.


Basically, it's just three brief descriptions that show a passage of time, while establishing a relationship between the two, that could take place over one day or a few.

I'll take a more thorough look at what you have and see if I can condense it, but it shouldn't be too bad.

Yea soldier what you posted seems to just be more of the script and not a montage every montage i have written or read in other scripts has been in the format Mike just showed or if the montage takes place in one specific area i have seen it like this:

INT. Bowling alley - Montage

Joe bowls a strike giving an emphatic fist pump.

Julie goes to bowl but throws a gutter bowl and falls backwards laughing.

Bob takes a bite of greasy pizza and chases it with beer.



I hope this helps, 2 pages is very long for a montage imo, but reading over what you posted it dosent really appear to be your traditional montage so it may work as is but if you really want a Rocky like montage then your gonna need to shorten it.

Here is the montage that I opened my screenplay, The Burnout with.  I post, in part, to whore the script.  But it also shows how a montage should be written:

FADE IN:

EXT.  TIMES SQUARE - MONTAGE -NIGHT

Theme restaurants and shops line the tourist-filled streets.

Happy families leave the Lion King Theater.

Police cars race down the street, away from the tourist area.

A car alarm WAILS on a side street.

Four guys drink beer outside a burned-out storefront.

A teenager scores a nickel-bag from a friend.

END MONTAGE.

I have six different shots, each only one line long.  Together, they go somewhere and tell a little story.  Together, we're talking about thirty seconds of screen time.

A montage should be short and sweet.  Hit the reader/viewer fast; hit 'em hard.  Get on with your story.


Phil

Quoted from Shelton Just glancing over it, Id say that you don't need to shorten it since it's not really a montage.  It just looks like more of the script.  Here's the montage example from the Screenwriter's Bible MONTAGE - BILL AND SUZY HAVE FUN TOGETHER -- They run along the beach.  Suzy raises her countenance against the ocean spray. -- They bicycle through a park. -- Bill buys Suzy ice cream at a small stand.  She stuffs it into his face.  The patrons chuckle.

i read that in the bible last night.

Well previously(not now) i had thought a montage was just a sequence of various short scenes, ussually with a music theme in the back.

I don't want to convey that part of the script as slow individual scenes, i want them to all be linked together with an overall theme, is there anything anyone suggests

Well previously(not now) i had thought a montage was just a sequence of various short scenes, ussually with a music theme in the back.

I don't want to convey that part of the script as slow individual scenes, i want them to all be linked together with an overall theme, is there anything anyone suggests

heres a new one i just wrote, whatdya think


MONTAGE -  SEVERAL DAYS OF VARIOUS OPERATIONS

- Whole squad lays down ammunition at enemies, above on a rooftop Remo picks them off with a sniper rifle, calm stern exspression.

- Remo plants several exsplosives on the left side of a building, one of his comrades Zach plants exsplosives on the right side of the building. The two converge together running away, the exsplosives detonate, the buidling implodes into itself.

- Remo runs down an alley, taking out various with single shots. Emerging from the alleys into a vast battle zone, his comrades pinned down under fire. Remo releases several bursts of fire, after a minute of exchanging gun fire, the enemies are taken out.



- In a dark building, Remo charges several enemies with automatic fire, screaming "Arghhhhh"

- In a urban warzone, Remo's comrade hands him a neon device. Remo takes off charging down the street at an incredible speed, headed toward a moving tank. Ducking udner the barrel of the tank, Remo places his foot on the tank, propelling himself ontop. Tossing the neon device into the cockpit, Remo takes off running, the tank blowing up in the backround.  

That's certainly more of a montage I would say.  

Some things that I would maybe change to cut it down even more is is the second part, split it up into two shots, one of the explosives being planted and the other of the building exploding (explosives don't cause implosions).  in between the two, the two converging can be cut out.

"after a minute of exchanging gun fire" - that's certainly a way to kill a montage.  I'd just take that small phrase out completely.

You're last part is a little long, I would suggest cutting it up even more.  You can probably get rid of the running down the street part.  Also, "the tank blows up in the BG" I think works better for the last part.

-Pat

I have a feature that I am currently rewriting.  Towards the end, I have a training montage of sorts (ala Rocky).  I've written montages before, but this one is a little different.  

All of the training takes place in the gym, but I want to show it out of order.  Such as:  man does push ups, man lifts weights, man continues pushups, man runs up bleachers, man lifts more weights.  Kind of jumping back and forth like that.

Currently, I have it written as such:

MONTAGE

GYM -- #1
Man does push ups two-handed.

GYM -- #2
Man bench presses a tremendous weight.

GYM -- #1
Man continues push ups, now one-handed

GYM -- #3
Man runs up bleachers.

END MONTAGE

I know this probably isn't an excepted way to write this, but could anyone show me a clearer and more concise way to do it?

Thanks,
Jonathan

Hmm...

BEGIN MONTAGE - JACK'S TRAINING

INT. GYM - DAY

Jack, moist, does two-handed push ups.

Jack, kinda sweaty, bench presses twice his body weight.

Jack, soaked, does more push ups.

Jack, drenching in sweat, runs up and down the metal bleachers.

END MONTAGE

INT. GYM LOCKER ROOM - DAY

Jim, exhausted, lies back on a bench. He squirts a water bottle all over his face and chest.
***

That's how I'd do it. Yay? Nay?

This is what Robert McKee had to say about montages in his book ‘Story’.

Quoted Text The high energy of such sequences is used to mask their purpose: the rather mundane task of conveying information. Like the Dream Sequence, the montage is an effort to make undramatized exposition less boring by keeping the audience's eye busy. With few exceptions, montages are a lazy attempt to substitute decorative photography and editing for dramatization and are, therefore to be avoided.

It occurs at a very important part of my script and is something that cannot be taken out.  Since there is some dialogue mixed it, is it possible to just write it this way:

INT. GYM -- NIGHT

Man does push ups.

LATER

Man bench presses.

LATER

Man runs up stairs.

I guess I just need to write what he does and let the director worry about piecing the scenes together, in or out of order.

I think your second example's fine.

So am I to assume you guys disagree with Mr McKee?

There are some movies with great montages. One that comes to mind is THE DEVIL WEARS PRADA. One bad one is RENT. The monologues are pointless in that one.

I like them as long as there's a point to them. Most amateurs write them with no point - just to advance the plot or get to the next week, or whatever.

I don't give screenwriting books, or the people that spew them, much credit. I've learned more from reading scripts than I did from McKee's book, or David Trottier's "Bible".

(EDIT: Haha, of course I was writing this right when ABSteel posted)

I dug out and checked David Troittier's "The Screenwriter's Bible".

He doesn't say anything negative about the use of Montages. Following Quotes are from his book.

Quoted Text A MONTAGE is a sequence of brief shots expressing the same or similar idea, such as passage of time, or a stream of consciousness.

Quoted Text Similar to the MONTAGE is the SERIES OF SHOTS, consisting of quick shots that tell a story. They lead to some dramatic resolution or dramatic action, whereas a MONTAGE focuses on a single concept.

Judging from what you want to do, I think you should stick to a montage. Troittier gives a few formatting examples (I edited them for length):

MONTAGE - SUZY AND BILL HAVE FUN TOGETHER

-- They run along the beach

-- They bicycle through a park

-- Bill humps Suzy

Or if you want to add the locations:

MONTAGE - SUZY AND BILL HAVE FUN TOGETHER

-- A beach - They run along the beach

-- A park - They bicycle through a park

-- In bed - Bill humps Suzy

You can even put the location in CAPS, slug-style.  I, personally, like the second example the most.

By the way, in your original post, you differentiate between 3 gyms. Is that necessary ? If so, then you could use the second example to implement that, using locations.

Hope this helps,

Yves

Fair enough guys. I guess the montage at the end of the Six Feet Under series was a beauty. As a rule I would avoid montages, mainly because they’ve been done to death, but there are exceptions to every rule.

Edit: Here's that SFU montage: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D1eFsJ1u4aY

"Most amateurs write them with no point - just to advance the plot"

This made me laugh, ABSteel.  Isn't that the point?  I mean, I write scenes to advance the plot.  I write dialogue to advance the plot.  It would be pointless if the montage didn't advance the plot.  Correct?

I've thought about this, but there is no logical way to leave the montage out.  Think about the Rocky movies.  If there was no training montage, then the story wouldn't make sense.  My story is kind of like this.

Yeah, but it should show something else.

Like in The Devil Wears Prada. The opening montage shows the girls getting dressed. Some girls are all frilly, with bows and lace and whatever, but then you have Andy. She's dull. She wears her thrift store skirt and her grandma's jacket. She's nothing like those other girls.

As a matter of fact, I don't think it advances the plot. The movie could start without that montage, and be okay. I looked up the script to see how they did it, but the montage isn't there. I'm not sure when it was added, but whatever.

The montage in your script, and in Rocky, doesn't just advance the plot. It shows character. Rocky's this hard working guy. He trains his ass off. He's persistent. He's strong. He's a fuckin' bad ass.

That's my take.

I actually need help with something similar to this, also.

I'm writing a script (which I'm directing), and a vital opening scene consists of the character turning on the faucet, then cutting to steam emanating from the shower, then him brushing his teeth, then him shaving.

I used this formula:

"INT. BATHROOM

Man turns on the shower faucet.

LATER

Steam emanates from the shower.

LATER

Man brushes his teeth.

LATER

Man shaves."

I guess it works, but it seems a tad bit tedious. I was reading the Little Miss Sunshine script, which had a similar sequence, and the way the writer did it was:

"JUMP CUTS:

Dwayne does push ups.

Dwayne does sit ups.

Dwayne bench presses."

It seems like that would work perfectly, but I always hear that using something like "Jump cuts:" is really frowned upon. Any advice?

If you're directing, it doesn't matter what the script looks like.

You take up too much space in your example. Try something like this:

BEGIN MONTAGE - MAN GETS READY FOR WORK

- Man turns on the shower.

- Steam engulfs the room. Man sings Queen.

- Man wipes down the mirror. A foamy toothbrush is in his mouth.

- Man shaves.

END MONTAGE

Six lines compared to eight. Hope that helps.

With "Jump cuts", it's frowned upon in spec scripts because it's a director's choice. You shouldn't try to direct the film, since, in most cases, you won't be the director.

Quoted from ABennettWriter If you're directing, it doesn't matter what the script looks like. You take up too much space in your example. Try something like this: BEGIN MONTAGE - MAN GETS READY FOR WORK - Man turns on the shower. - Steam engulfs the room. Man sings Queen. - Man wipes down the mirror. A foamy toothbrush is in his mouth. - Man shaves. END MONTAGE Six lines compared to eight. Hope that helps. With "Jump cuts", it's frowned upon in spec scripts because it's a director's choice. You shouldn't try to direct the film, since, in most cases, you won't be the director.

Yeah, it's just a script for a small short that I'm making, so I doubt it really matters. But thanks, I'll take your advice.

Glad I could help.

I tried having a look through the last few pages of questions but couldn't see anything that quite covered my query.

In a script I'm currently revising I use a montage which has a voiceover going on throughout it, plus there's also a separate 'series of shots' sequence with its own voice over.

I understand the formatting for both these elements, but do I type out the dialogue for the voiceover before or after the montage description (which is just one paragraph) and the series of shots (a list of about five short, sharp action shots)?

I can't seem to find a clean clear way of doing it.  The voiceovers don't correspond to specific individual images or reference points in the either sequence, so it would seem too messy to scatter the dialogue throughout the shot descriptions.

Any suggestions? Are there set rules or do I just try and find the clearest method?

By the way, I've just recently found this site and I'm glad I did.  It's a great place for advice and I've managed to put myself straight on some other burning questions I've had for quite a while!

I would go with the image you're showing, then the voice over.  The voice is actually reacting to the images here.



Phil

Thank you, that does seem to make sense and was what I was sort of leaning towards.  

Does anyone also have or know of any scripted examples of this kind of thing that already exist that I could read? Just so I can get a feel for it... I'm having a look around at the scripts at the moment but I'd be really grateful if someone could point me in the right direction!

I have a film noir script that's done completely in voice over.  Look up 'Price Check on Film Noir' in the shorts section.


Phil

casino, goodfellas, etc casino in particular

I just popped open the "A" section on the movie scripts page, and found a couple that I think may fit your needs.

Annie Hall

Army of Darkness

Both of these scripts have a lot going on throughout VOs in the beginning, not montages,  but very similar.

IMO, the way these are broken out with actual sluglines is better than the MONTAGE with the VO.

I'm not sure if this was answered by Phil's response to scarydonut but how about if you want a character's dialgoue to happen within the montage?

Gabe

I'm in the same boat. I have a montage of flashbacks at the end of my script, all the images in the montage are from scenes earlier in the film, only this time they reveal the killers face. A voice over is playing over the montage.

The problem is, I want some of the flashbacks to have a line of dialogue the character said in the earlier scene. Two different lines of dialogue, from two different scenes, in the one montage.

They do this in "SAW", with the recording playing while the flashbacks reveal who Jigsaw really is, but the script for that movie is really hard to follow as I think the guy directed it himself.

Can anybody give me any pointers?

Brian

That may have been the shooting script that you read, which would have more detail than a spec script.

I have a script with several flashbacks in it, one of which is an extension of another (kinda like what you want to do).  I numbered each of the flashbacks and, when I wanted to use one again, I mentioned using flashback number 5 again.

Hope this helps.


Phil

Thanks for the help.

Just to clarify something else, would I start the flashback this way...

FLASHBACK

and end it with

END FLASHBACK ?

Or since there are many different scenes in the flashback, all of the murder scenes at different locations, would I have to use scene headings for each location?

Many thanks.

Brian

Brian,

Some writers use it like this:

INT. HOUSE - NIGHT/FLASHBACK

The face of Brian is lit by the moonlight, he has the a scar like the killer. Brian killed Jenny Brod.

Hehe. This is just an example. And inside this scene you could add a Montage sequence and you could even describe the montage like this:

INT. HOUSE - NIGHT/FLASHBACK

The face of Brian is lit by the moonlight, he has the a scar like the killer. Brian killed Jenny Brod.

MONTAGE - FLASHBACK

The killer approaching Jenny Brod. The face of Brian is revealed.

Brian shooting at his dog.

He throws the gun away.

Hope this helps.

Cheeers

Quoted from Brian M Thanks for the help. Just to clarify something else, would I start the flashback this way... FLASHBACK and end it with END FLASHBACK ? Or since there are many different scenes in the flashback, all of the murder scenes at different locations, would I have to use scene headings for each location? Many thanks. Brian

I would put FLASHBACK in parenthesis in the slugline and when it's over, the next slugline I would have PRESENT in parenthesis.

THIS IS A MONTAGE FROM ONE OF MY SCREENPLAYS THE RAINBOW KINGDOM

EXT. FOREST LIGHT SIDE OF THE KINGDON - DAY
Anabelle and Oliver follow the forest trail

MONTAGE - OLIVER AND ANABELLE HAVE FUN TOGETHER

-- Annabelle runs through the forest Oliver chases her

-- Oliver runs through the forest Annabelle chases him

-- Oliver runs through the forest gives Annabelle a piggy back

-- Oliver and Annabelle roll down a hill in the forest

-- anabelle runs through the forest gives Oliver a piggy back

-- oliver and anabelle stand in a cave rain falls thunder rumbles

BACK TO SCENE
please note you can use dialogue in montage

I borrowed advice from a couple of different places to combine a flashback and montage thusly:

                                                                 FLASHBACK TO:

INT/EXT - LOCATIONS - VARIOUS - DAY/NIGHT

MONTAGE

A younger Aaron teaches a younger Hein how to properly shoot
at a CIA shooting range.

Aaron and Hein lead a team of CIA agents busting into a
seedy room to capture a group of criminals.

Aaron pushes a wounded Hein out from in front of a car
bearing down on him, saving his life.

A criminal has the drop on Aaron, and is about to shoot him,
when Hein shoots the criminal just in time to save his life.

END MONTAGE

BACK TO PRESENT

I don't know if it's exactly right, but  I felt it read correctly to convey the idea.

I've done it a few different ways.  Never really knew there was a "right" vs "wrong" way.  Below is the most recent way I've written it for my spec Sunset Summer and how I have seen it written.  


EXT. FAIR - NIGHT

MONTAGE

“Everybody Needs Somebody to Love” continues.

Quinn and Matt enjoying the fair.

EXT. FERRIS WHEEL

Quinn and Matt ride the Ferris wheel.

EXT. MIDWAY

Quinn and Matt, walk around the midway, eating cotton candy.

Playing games on the midway...Matt doesn’t win anything.  He just shrugs and smiles at Quinn.

“Everybody Needs Somebody to Love” plays in the distance.

Quinn and Matt walk over to the concert stage.

END MONTAGE

Then I head the next scene as follows:

EXT. STAGE - NIGHT - CONTINUOUS

Though I think this is a montage that is a little different so to speak.  So for me I think this is the simplest way.  I did it this way I believe in a couple of shorts that I've let people use and one that was used in a screenwriting class - and the teacher nor no one said it anything about it.  As long as the same format/template is used consistently I'm not sure it really matters all that much.  


Of course if a producer or DP ( or reader) reads/read it and went WTF? Then you obviously have not made it clear enough for them and in that case it needs to be redone.

I also included the music - though for this particular spec they were actually intended as placeholders and to give the me and the reader the idea of music that's involved.  Though the producers that read my Sunset Summer (the few I actually heard back from) liked the fact that I put what song should play during the scene... One said it was helpful for the tone of the film.  the other two didn't say why, but that they liked it.  Though normally referencing music should be left out.  

In scripts like shorts and stuff that I know I'm going to write, produce and direct myself I write a little different than other specs. Just because I know I'm the top person that will be going WTF?  if something doesn't make sense... which has happened.  My goal with those is to keep the actors and crew from going WTF? or "I'm confused" in the middle of shooting a scene - that's bad, really bad.

EDIT: Just was editing/cleaning up Sunset Summer and noticed on my script MONAGE entered the sluglines!  Not that it's bad, but it wasn't supposed to be that way. I feel it's easier if MONTAGE has it's own line, but I've seen plenty of scripts that are fine and have:

EXT. FAIR - NIGHT- MONTAGE

I've also found out that sometimes when using my laptop, which is a mac dinosaur by apple standards today. I've realized that  FD7 tends to get a mind of it's own sometimes, where random text disappears and/or appears in odd locations, creating headaches for me.  I mean I love autosave but ALWAYS use an external mouse when on the laptop - it lessens the problems.  

Also I recommend listing the shots with a # or Letter to make it clearer, and I didn't that my script, but just listed it here so people can get an idea.