Elm Way, episode 1: First Lane Drive by Bryy Miller - Series - Neat freak and generally naive Susan McCarthy is the lease owner of a two-story victorian on the outskirts of Los Angeles, in a creepy little small town called Elm Way. Richard is the teen soap star old enough to be his own older brother; Starter is the severly-mentally handicapped wiseass; Hope is just a goody-two shoes; Jake is a tech nerd; Lily is the token young'un with a bit more maturity than everyone else; and Danny is.... odd.   Charlie is the new guy, so he doesn't stand a chance.  By the way, they live in the strangest town in the universe.  - html, format 8)

This script just seemed to be a couple of roomates bickering.  You have a bunch of oddball characters, but they're not doing anything.


Phil

It seems you haven't read the full way through. I'm not trying to be Red vs. Blue here (even though this is a machinima).

I read up to the confessional.


Phil

It's two pages. There's a 'next' link at the bottom you need to click. This seems to even confuse my cast members.

Having read 'part two,' my feelings for this story hasn't changed.  You're putting oddball characters together and just letting them do their own thing.  There's no cohesion or direction.

When all you have is screwball characters running around, and no straight man, the insanity just becomes the normal.  There's no impact to it.


Phil

A big part of why this series is hard for me is that its story is a big too big for the thirty minute mark.

Don't worry about the thirty minute mark, or how many pages it is.  When I first wrote The Burnout (as a screenplay) it was over 150 pages long.  It's now about 120.  I concerned myself with the length after I wrote it.


Phil

Well, I suppose that the same strategies make sense for "animation".