The Absolutely Clueless Movie by A. C. Henry - Short, Comedy - Two British webshow hosts find out two Canadians are ripping off their show and set off to stop them.  27 pages - pdf, format 8)

A.C.,

First I hafta say -- your name makes me think of A.C. Slater from "Saved by the Bell."  lol.  yes, i'm a nerd...

onto your script --

it was a little hard for me to read.  it looks like you formatted your script on microsoft word and tried manually formatting the script.  i did this with my first script, until someone told me of celtx (which you can download for free).  google it.

besides the obvious formatting issues (also, don't number scenes!), i couldn't understand why you had certain words in parantheses, until i realized that you were "translating" british idioms to us.  i think you should take all those out.  

americans, at some point, have heard things like, "bloke (which you mispelled as "block"), "pint" and some others.  

it's not necessary.  if you're a good writer, we can gather from context and other inferences, even if we've never heard of those words used.  

i liked the premise, but the formatting and unnecessary parantheses, prevented me from finishing your story.  

Quoted from lalaindahouse ... i couldn't understand why you had certain words in parantheses, until i realized that you were "translating" british idioms to us.  i think you should take all those out.   americans, at some point, have heard things like, "bloke (which you mispelled as "block"), "pint" and some others.

Translating English for Americans? I'm gonna have to read this.

What on earth is going on around here lately?  :-/