Greenbridge by Jackson Orlowski - Short, Comedy, Adventure - This is a medieval comedy action/adventure pilot for a T.V. show. It follows Toby a banished man looking for work in this new town.  20 pages - pdf, format 8)

I made it to page 2 and that's when I reached my quota of spelling and grammatical errors, which is good because I was just about to reach my limit for absurdity as well.

Jordan

I'm gonna give your screenplay a read over.  I will write stuff down that I think might be wrong.  If you have the same mistake (spelling errors, past tense usage, using the word is etc), I only list those once.

Good luck:

1.  You want to refrain from telling the director or cameraman how to do their job.  No camera actions unless it's vital to the scene in your head working.

2.  Can't picture a king saying "you're so silly"

3.  Wow, lots of typos, Edward isn't capitalized, contractions aren't used properly (should'nt) and he slices the princes neck it's prince's neck etc

4.  How in the world does he slice a prince's neck?

5.  I can see why Nomad gave up.  This is pretty, um, not good so far.  I hope it gets better.

6.  I won't even talk about stuff that Tobias can't possibly know about (like genetics etc), but, you have to make it more believable.  I have no problems believing in a half-llama if the world supports it, but, nothing this character has done makes any sense.

7.  I get that you are going for comedy and wit, but, it's gotta make sense.

8.  umm, the amount of insane stuff like oral sex, using words like retard etc, who in the world is gonna read this to the end, much less finance it.  I just don't see this happening for it at all.

9.  What in the world.  The ogre tries to kill himself, again, and it's a running joke?  Really, this is almost insane beyond insanity.  And the typos are really bad.

10.  Oh, dude, now he's walking down a street of broken past jobs looking for a current job.  This is sad...

11.  I will say some of the dialog is, on occasion, funny.  The minotaur stuff is pretty funny.

12.  I gotta give you credit, when the 3 of them meet the minotaur, I laughed really hard, but, I think it's more b/c i'm pretty screwed up and not b/c it's funny or good, but, if anyone can make it that far, are the dick jokes funny, or am I just sick?  Can't tell...

13.  The humor works from time to time.  The image of Jon getting destroyed is pretty funny.  I laughed for a good 20 seconds straight.  The rest of it, I've cried for a full 20 min straight.  Not a good trade off!

14.  How can the minotaur not feel Toby climbing up it's back?  It's back to being not good now.

15.  The set up for that Cain joke when the minotaur ahem, loses him, is badly done.  I didn't find that too funny, not like some of the other setups.

16.  That was an insane romp through some thing.  It was not good, but, it did have moments where I really laughed.  It's a hard read, but, there are some generally funny moments.

I don't know if you have your word check off, but, all the typos and stuff should be handled by that.  There are no such words as crys and should'nt.  You should spend time to make sure that you do all of that correctly.

I might be willing to give this a second read if you fix a lot of it up, it's okay to have crazy dialog, but, make the situation believable.   Watch Monte' Python stuff.  Read other screenplays.  

Good luck
Dan

Dan is on a roll :)  Go Dan!