Amy by Eric Chandler - Short, Drama - A suicidal woman meets a amnesiac man. 7 pages - pdf, format

Writer interested in feedback on this work

The script is missing punctuation marks - no periods, question marks. Take another shot at at.

Page 1: How do we know Amy has been crying for quite some time? I think Amy saying 'make yourself comfortable', is weird coming from someone who just attempted suicide. How is she so rational at this point? Other than that, I thought you wrote a really intriguing script, that I think you should expand on.

Hi Eric,

Almost all your sentences start with either Amy or George. Try changing the perspective every once in a while, it will make for a much better read.

As already stated, there is a lot of missing punctuation.

Quoted Text AMY Who are you

I'm confused, didn’t she just say George a few lines back?

Quoted Text GEORGE Your right and maybe I never will but please don’t do this

You're

Quoted Text AMY Do you have a cell phone? GEORGE I’m not really sure what that is AMY Well you can stay here until you remember

Until you remember what a cell phone is?

Quoted Text Amy is laying

Amy lies on the floor. Need to google the difference between lay and lie.

Quoted Text GEORGE You’ll soon find someone who needs you a lot more than you need me

Huh?

Lots of awkward writing and grammar issues.

I have absolutely no idea what that is about so I can comment on the story.

You will benefit from reading more scripts and reading some articles on screenwriting.

All the best.