The View From Sunny Heights by Steven Sallie - Short, Comedy - An elderly man passes away in a retirement home... and it only gets weirder from there. 4 pages - pdf format

Writer interested in feedback on this work

Hi Steven

I didn't see comedy in it - maybe you should have posted it in Drama.
Format and writing is fair, on track. The story to me was bland and with no punch in it.

All the best.

Hi, Sallie,

This was a sarcastic comedy for me. Literally, been standing between life and death. A great of showing that no one gives a damn about anyone. Especially, if they are strangers. They just move on.

Even though the writing could have been much more fluid for the first 2 pages if you had used mini-slugs, it was easy to read and follow.

Good luck.