Full Metal Alchemist pilot by Dominic Turnbull - Series, Sci fi/Fantasy, Historic - A live action, mandaloran inspired, look of the show. 35 pages - pdf format

Writer interested in feedback on this work

Hey Dominic,

It's neat that you wrote a FMA spec, but there's a lot to work on here. Full disclosure, I skimmed the second half.

Be more clear with your visuals, be more direct with your dialogue, and familiarize yourself with the conventions of screenwriting. Tons of resources and forums here.
You kinda seem to know the formatting and look of a script, but remember that scripts should be visual and easy to follow. Also, I don't know which program you used to write this, but I was distracted by the page breaks.

There were too many typos and easy to fix mistakes, I'd consider proofreading some more.

Best of luck~