Finally making some good progress on my next feature, my attempt to flip the home-invasion subgenre on its head. I've got a solid 40 pages written so far, but can't help but feel like it's missing something. Feels like it needs another layer. Would anyone be interested in giving me some feedback? :)

If I had to pitch the basic concept, I'd say it's an inverted take on Dog Soldiers, just switch out werewolves with witches, and with a similar tone to From Dusk Till Dawn. :)

Here's a (very messy) logline - After a horrific bus accident claims the lives of dozens of children, a group of grieving parents band together with a mysterious stranger to confront the sole survivors of the accident, a pair of creepy siblings who escaped without so much as a scratch.

If you're interested in taking a look, let me know and I'll send you the teaser. :)

Happy to take a look now that the Quickie is over and the next is a while away.

My email is on all my scripts.

Quoted from Warren Happy to take a look now that the Quickie is over and the next is a while away. My email is on all my scripts.

Hell yeah, Dude! Thanks.  ;D I'll send it right over.

Anything you'd like me to look at in return?

Quoted from Zack Hell yeah, Dude! Thanks.  ;D I'll send it right over. Anything you'd like me to look at in return?

I'm all good for the moment. thanks.

I'll dive in tomorrow :)

Quoted from Warren I'll dive in tomorrow :)

No rush. Sent. :)

Thanks again!

I'm 35 pages in, I have a lot of notes that I'll send over tomorrow when I finish it.

You definitely have something here IMO.

Quoted from Warren I'm 35 pages in, I have a lot of notes that I'll send over tomorrow when I finish it. You definitely have something here IMO.

Awesome! Looking forward to reading your notes. Happy to hear you think I'm on to something. :)

I've actually just finished up the first draft. It's short, only coming in at 68 pages, but I really like what I've got. That said, I still think it's missing something. A subplot or something. Gonna try to get this to at least 80 pages before I submit a draft here on SS.

Quoted from Zack I've actually just finished up the first draft. It's short, only coming in at 68 pages, but I really like what I've got. That said, I still think it's missing something. A subplot or something. Gonna try to get this to at least 80 pages before I submit a draft here on SS.

Can you send me the lot?

Quoted from Warren Can you send me the lot?

Absolutely, just beware of the typos. Lol. Haven't had a chance to clean it up.

Sent. :)

Notes sent via PM x 3 :)

Quoted from Zack so far, but can't help but feel like it's missing something. Feels like it needs another layer.

I think I've given you some points to add that extra layer, or even layers, just not sure if it's a direction you'd want to go in. Interested to hear your thoughts.

Quoted from Warren I think I've given you some points to add that extra layer, or even layers, just not sure if it's a direction you'd want to go in. Interested to hear your thoughts.

Thanks for all the excellent notes!!! Definitely given me some great tips that will no doubt help me in the long run. Really appreciate it. :)

I'm very interested is discussing this script further with you. If you've got the time, of course. :)