The Vegan Butcher by Srikumar Govardhanagiri - Short, Comedy, Dark Comedy - Two mob wise guys, Sonny and Vic are tasked with handling the protesting vegans at Sloppy Joey's ahead of the restaurant's launch. Will they succeed or the vegans prove to be too much to handle?  9 pages - pdf format

Writer interested in feedback on this work

Hey Srikumar,

Gotta be honest didn't really care for it. Right off the bat you have two mob guys talking about killing a baby, kinda of a turnoff for me.

And the end where the vegan Ashleigh butchers the mob guys. I get it the vegan butcher strikes again.

I'm going to tell you what some people told me about a couple of screenplays I had critiqued, they just didn't care what happened to any of the characters. A fatal flaw.

I think it might have been better if one of the mob guys became sweet on Ashleigh and went into business with her.

Mike