To Gain by Jaime Sarabia - Short, Action, Drama - Two cousins hang out before one goes away forever. 8 pages - pdf format

Writer interested in feedback on this work

Interesting little story. To Gain. Or Not To Gain, is the question.

For me personally it was a bit tricky to follow.

Too much ellipsis, italics and so on.

Keep it simple is my input, but I did enjoy the experience of reading something like this, since I liked your descriptions.

Keep going.