I like the tense situation between the officers and the couple. The idea of police using technology to track down and punish protesters is truly frightening. You really have something here. The appearance of the ghost was a bit of a letdown. I wanted to see how Nisha and Keith would resolve this on their own without supernatural intervention. What would that have looked like? It might be interesting to experiment with a different ending.

Sorry writer, but this one doesn't work for me on any level.

Very messy. Choppy writing, on the nose dialog, and story that just doesn't really make sense to me.

I'd suggest a heavy rewrite.

Best of luck to you.

Well. It's a fittingly uncomfortable read for the first few pages. It felt genuine. I was nervous and excited about where it could possibly be heading. Solidly hooked.

I really dislike deus ex machina. That it comes in the form of an avenging spirit is the last thing I expected, and while that's usually a good thing, here it felt incredibly out of place and a little insulting. No avenging spirit is going to address the issues so blatantly on display here. If you're going to shine a spotlight on the issues, follow through with a message.

Strong potential, the ending just didn't work for me.