About the swimsuit rather than nude thing, IMO, torn maybe even bloody clothes would work better as it tells us there's been violence prior. The right type of close would also look better once bloodied and/or wet.

How could you forget to tell everyone that Dena and I will attempt to shoot this one?? Even better, a second guy contacted Don about interest in this script! Funny to me since there was a discussion about this being too hard and too big budget to do.  

Quoted from Grandma Bear How could you forget to tell everyone that Dena and I will attempt to shoot this one?? Even better, a second guy contacted Don about interest in this script! Funny to me since there was a discussion about this being too hard and too big budget to do.

I just assumed everyone already knew.  And I will leave the fashion choices to you ladies.

I love SS collaborations -- so much so that I told that other guy to take a hike because my favorite movie girls were already on the case!  

I need to brag on Bert's behalf.  I got an email a few days ago from a filmmaker which I forwarded on to Bert.

Quoted from random filmmaker "I wanted to contact Dr. David Reed about his script The Starving Sea, ( Oct. 28 ).  Is his email available?"

This isn't so much about SimplyScripts as it is about having one good low budget short in your holster.

-Don

Quoted Text This was a nod to the source material.  That is how you defeat the blob.  With cold.  A sad shake of the head to our British friends who chided me that the sea is too cold for this to work.  You guys need to get down to Florida more often.  Pia, Dena, and I will undoubtedly buy you a pint when you do.

The sad shake of the head is unwarranted.

You've made a rookie error, I'm afraid.


The original Blob came from outer space. It was an amoeba that lived on a meteorite travelling at high speeds. An organism that could survive and thrive in EXTREME HIGH TEMPERATURES. Capable even of surviving burn up when the meteorrite entered Earth's atmosphere.

Hence, the cold killed it, because it was the opposite of how it normally lived.


Your creature is not the Blob. Your creature is a deep sea dwelling monster.

At no point is its origin explained. It merely appears from beneath the waves. Having come from the depths, we can only assume that's where it lives. We cannot even presume it lives on the warm surface, as no-one ever sees them.

All seas are cold in the deep. Especially if one is to live there permanently.

To follow the same logic as the original story...the opposite is needed to destroy it.

FIRE, or some other form of extreme heat.

Bear in mind, outside the OWC, there is nothing to connect this story with the Blob without a title change and some kind of exposition explaining what it is. In the absence of that, it can only be presumed to be some sort of sea creature...perhaps a huge jellyfish or squid type affair.

Up to you and your team whether you heed my advice, of course, but you'll find that it's brought up by almost everyone that watches it, if you don't.

Nice work Bert, I must be the only one that doesn't yet recognise your style. Even though you do have a very distinctive voice I just took it for what it is, an exceptionally well written script from a writer that enjoys what they do.

Didn't have this one on the radar. I thought it was written very well but the story was missing completely. However, congrats bert!

Nice work and congrats on being nominated for OWC.

I could see why you got nominated. I like these types of tales. There're so fucked up lol. Wouldn't she try to learn how to jumpstart the boat or see if there phones are somewhere in the boat. Or start hacking the chain away. Lol.

Nice entry and good luck with this getting this made. Can't wait to see it.
Gabe

Quoted from Mr.Ripley Wouldn't she try to learn how to jumpstart the boat or see if there phones are somewhere in the boat. Or start hacking the chain away. Lol.

IMO, no. The story ends on the ironic note that she can't reach the keys. What will happen to her is up to the viewer to imagine.

Also, no 18 year old girl I know would know how to "jumpstart" a boat. As far as phones go, cell phone service out on the ocean is pretty much non existent.  Radio maybe, but again, that's not the point of the story.

Other than that...yeah, I can't wait to see this either!!  

Hey pia

When I mentioned jumpstart the boat, I meant she would try to mess around. She's got nothing better to do. Lol. But it's just me talking. Nothing to add to the script.

Good luck with this
Gabe

Anybody else see this news?

"What Is This Bizarre Purple Goo Taking Over Norway's Coast?"

I read this one, it was fun.  It isn't low budget.  And I'm a huge fan of this story as it was written by Stephen King "The Raft."  

I didn't even realize it was the Blob until I read the comments.  I was a bit confused as to why you'd rewrite the Raft, but, on a boat...

Good job...

Dan!!!!  

Bert, that gives me some ideas. besides blood and guts and bits of flesh, we could also have a BIG jello blob. How's the script coming, btw?

Hey Bert,

Hope this script isn't so old that I can't be of help. In any case, not really sure where to dig in as far as noteworthy scripts at the moment; obviously haven't been around for a minute. Figured one of yours would be as good a place to start as any.

A few notes...

- EXT. THE GULF OF MEXICO - I was initially going to let this slide, but having reached the end of the script, it occurs to me this specificity has no bearing on the story whatsoever, at least none that I can discern. I’d change to EXT. OPEN OCEAN just for immediacy’s sake.

- Descriptions of the surroundings are a little broad for my taste. For one, what is a small boat, exactly? A rowboat? Nope; there’s a hull. Is there a cabin? Anything else?

Little details like this made it a little difficult for me to find my bearings in the scene. I’d go back and try to set the scene a little more clearly. I don’t mind that you’ve taken a more directorial approach here, but I’d prefer to be able to see it a little better in my head.

- I’m wondering about the weight of this “blob” attacking the boat and what have you. Would the boat tilt or what? See my latter comment in regards to this. Again, I don’t know *exactly* what kind of boat we’re dealing with here.

pg. 5 - “The blob smells it.” - Can’t say I really have a sense of what this would look like. I’d elaborate.

A short-and-sweet review for you...

Honestly not much to say about this one really, other than it was fun, strange, and perhaps a little campy with a cool/gross albeit sort of standard monster at its center. It was perhaps a little too simple for its own good; the characters weren't developed much beyond their respective archetypes, but perhaps that's more to do with the page limit than anything. That said, say this were cut from a larger work, it'd be a perfectly effective scene with a low-key but sort of pulpy, darkly comic ending.

As per usual, well-done, sir. Still enjoy your work ten years after I first came around these parks. Keep doing what you're doing.

Quoted from DanC I read this one, it was fun.  It isn't low budget.

Thanks, Dan.  We'll see about that last comment.  Reworking a few things to try and make it work (along with my favorite movie grrrrls Pia and Dena!!)

Not sure how to respond to your comments about "The Raft", though, so I'll just leave those sit.

Quoted from James McClung Figured one of yours would be as good a place to start as any.

I know!  You can't go wrong, right?   Always appreciate a look from you.

Quoted from James McClung EXT. THE GULF OF MEXICO

Fair point.  I was just writing what I know, I guess.  You find specific sorts of people down here in Florida, and those are who I had in mind.  Your comments about the boat itself are also fair, but honestly, any boat of adequate size would do, and I didn't want to rely on specific details for a specific boat that might prove unavailable later.

Quoted from James McClung It was perhaps a little too simple for its own good

Yeah, the OWC will do that for you sometimes.  But I didn't really have much more to say beyond the scenario itself.  It was more about the "camp" and having a little fun, and shoehorning too much context into a story like this can be an ill fit for its intended audience.

Quoted from James McClung ...ten years...

Ugh...why even go there, James?  That seems impossible -- but it has also been fun to watch a few writers around here mature into something special over that time.  [Note:  F*ck Matais]

Thanks!

Hey Burt,

You're Robert Newcomer??

If you didn't see the Raft, or read the short story from Stephen King, it was a lot like that.  A group of kids go out on a raft for a fun day of drinking, swimming and sex, but, it all goes to hell when a creature attacks the raft.  

The short story was on a Stephen King book called Skeleton Crew (I think) and was in the movie Creepshow 2.  

Like I said, it's a pretty well known story.  And (IMO) similar to your story.

It was still good, but, like I said, very close...

Dan