Quoted from MarkRenshaw It seems to me that Amy doesn't need Brad at all. She tells Brad who the next mark is going to be, she kills them in spectacular fashion. What is Brad's role in this partnership? I think that's the biggest problem I had with this. At least make it so he picks out the next mark from some unsolved crime cases.

Not my script, and I had to go back for a re-read. But, that's in there. Page 7.

Quoted from ColinS I guess, seeing as we're here to criticise the shit out of each other -

Welcome to the OWC! Yes. That's what we do. Fun, ain't it?

But, you'll notice over time... we're all slowly becoming better writers. You seem to be embracing things... that's a really good sign!

Tom turning out to be a scumbag was a surprise. The Brad-Amy pairing was very nice. He has her kill in the name of justice, and she does because she enjoys it. A twisted version of good cop-bad cop. Having Tom rip off his own head was very cool. A solid piece of writing.

Hi Writer,

Liked this one a lot. Meets all the requirements, well written and in the end pretty dark stuff. All things considered, one of my favourites. Really good stuff.

Good luck,
Glenn

Hello writer

Really good writing, great story with some nice gore for good measure.

Guess you threw in 2 unexpected villains lol but if Tom is a monster, not sure why Brad would want to sit with him and be all friendly and share a drink.

I think the opening conversation between the two needs something, I don't know what though. Something to add a little intrigue, or, when the twist is revealed we go "Ooooh, that's what that was about"

Overall though this is good work