Quoted Text So will you be a more regular contributer to SS now, Al? I'd love to read some of your other work. God we're all in for a flogging in the future OWC's :p

Haha! One of my goals for this year was to become more actively involved in writing, and the community. Something I've always slacked on, so yeah I may stick around. Whether I enter an OWC is a different story, if the genre fits then maybe. I tend to find comedy/quirky horror/thrillers stories easier to write. I have a couple of scripts I may put up on the regular forums though for feedback.

Now...

I'm wondering how I'm going to get spiders out of my mind when I'm eating guacamole.

Then...

Do I really ever want to eat guacamole ever again?!

Early on I kept thinking there was someone hiding in the back
with the crates and that he was going to come out at any time.
I think that would have been interesting, but that's not
the direction you were headed with this script.

Very creepy writing, that's for sure. Good job on the challenge!  

Hey there, Al.

The writing here is great. Sucked me right it. A real page turner. I had no issue visualizing what you wanted me to see. You've got some real talent.

I hate spiders, so you get some brownie points there. Creeped me out. You nailed the prolonged suspense.

Only real issue I've got is the ending with the big spider. I just didn't buy it. Where did it come from? All the other spiders came from the back of the truck, so was the big spider just "in the area"?

Still, some really great writing here. I enjoyed it.

Quoted from Zack . Only real issue I've got is the ending with the big spider. I just didn't buy it. Where did it come from? All the other spiders came from the back of the truck, so was the big spider just "in the area"?

There was reference to the EPA earlier in the script, we assume the two are linked.

My issue is that your stance on this has now changed. In my thread about stuff having a reason you argued that is wasn't important, you've also stated the same thing about your scripts, but now I've seen you question why things are happening on two different scripts.

I for one am confused about where you stand on this. I'm not expecting a reply as my thread was locked but I thought it was strange.

Quoted from Warren There was reference to the EPA earlier I'm the script, we assume the two are linked. My issue is that your stance on this has now changed. In my thread about stuff having a reason you argued that is wasn't important, you've also stated the same thing about your scripts, but now I've seen you question why things are happening on two different scripts. I for one am confused about where you stand on this. I'm not expecting a reply as my thread was locked but I thought it was strange.

I didn't lock your thread, Dude. But to answer your question... I suppose it just depends on the story whether or not motivation/exposition is important.

I figured the reference to the EPA was the hint/set up to the big spider at the end. Just seems odd that this big spider was waiting by the road where the truck so happened to stop. Do you really not see what I'm saying here, Warren?

In my scripts you are referring to, there may not be much in the way of motivation/exposition, but I believe there is a coherent logic to them that helps them feel natural. You don't get all the answers, but I give you enough to piece the story together yourself. Or at least that's my intention, obviously I need to work on my craft a bit more.

If you are still confused on my stance, go back and read all of my statements on your locked thread. Put away your emotion, take a breath, and READ what I said. If something isn't clear to you, PM me. I'll try to clear it up for ya. Or if you'd rather talk it out in person, I'll gladly give you my number. I don't wanna fight with you or anything. Honestly, you've given me some really helpful reviews in the past and I really appreciate it.

So yeah... Any more issues or concerns you have with my opinions. Just PM me. I'll respond.

Sorry to hijack your thread, Al. Really liked your script, Dude.

Quoted from Zack I didn't lock your thread, Dude. But to answer your question... I suppose it just depends on the story whether or not motivation/exposition is important. I figured the reference to the EPA was the hint/set up to the big spider at the end. Just seems odd that this big spider was waiting by the road where the ruck so happened to stop. Do you really not see what I'm saying here, Warren? In my scripts you are referring to, there may not be much in the way of motivation/exposition, but I believe there is a coherent logic to them that helps them feel natural. You don't get all the answers, but I give you enough to piece the story together yourself. Or at least that's my attention, obviously I need to work on my craft a bit more. If you are still confused on my stance, go back and read all of my statements on your locked thread. Put away your emotion, take a breath, and READ what I said. If something isn't clear to you, PM me. I'll try to clear it up for ya. Or if you'd rather talk it out in person, I'll gladly give you my number. I don't wanna fight with you or anything. Honestly, you've given me some really helpful reviews in the past. So yeah... Any more issues or concerns you have with my opinions. Just PM me. I'll respond. Sorry to hijack your thread, Al. Really liked your script, dude.

Didnt say you locked it.

Sure I've got time, I'll take this to PM.

Quoted from Zack Hey there, Al. The writing here is great. Sucked me right it. A real page turner. I had no issue visualizing what you wanted me to see. You've got some real talent. I hate spiders, so you get some brownie points there. Creeped me out. You nailed the prolonged suspense. Only real issue I've got is the ending with the big spider. I just didn't buy it. Where did it come from? All the other spiders came from the back of the truck, so was the big spider just "in the area"? Still, some really great writing here. I enjoyed it.

Thanks Zack, glad you enjoyed it.

In answer to the giant spider, it came from the back of the truck with the rest. Red's truck had essentially stopped in a contaminated area (hinted at in the news report in the beginning) and so some of the escaped spiders had mutated, not just one.

Of course, it's a stretch of the imagination that the spiders would mutate so fast, but then so is the entire script, this was supposed to just be a fun ride. Any deeper explanation would've just bogged it down.

Saying that, I am taking the ending out anyway and going back to the original draft which climaxed with Red being killed by the first big brother spider. That also makes it cheaper to make!

Quoted from Britman Thanks Zack, glad you enjoyed it. In answer to the giant spider, it came from the back of the truck with the rest. Red's truck had essentially stopped in a contaminated area (hinted at in the news report in the beginning) and so some of the escaped spiders had mutated, not just one. Of course, it's a stretch of the imagination that the spiders would mutate so fast, but then so is the entire script, this was supposed to just be a fun ride. Any deeper explanation would've just bogged it down. Saying that, I am taking the ending out anyway and going back to the original draft which climaxed with Red being killed by the first big brother spider. That also makes it cheaper to make!

Okay. Makes sense now. I think you are right to go with the original ending. The giant car sized spider was just too much IMO. Still really liked this. Looking forward to reading the rewrite.