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SimplyScripts Screenwriting Discussion Board    One Week Challenge    April, 2019 One Week Challenge  ›  Scripts of the April 2019 OWC Moderators: Zack
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  Author    Scripts of the April 2019 OWC  (currently 17563 views)
eldave1
Posted: May 2nd, 2019, 9:50pm Report to Moderator
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Quoted from Grandma Bear
I didn't read that many, so I don't know if Don has already sent out the voting emails. Maybe I didn't qualify this time. Did you guys get voting emails yet?


Nope. Figured for entrants only


My Scripts can all be seen here:

http://dlambertson.wix.com/scripts
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Warren
Posted: May 2nd, 2019, 10:37pm Report to Moderator
Of The Ancients


A man who has taught his mind to misbehave

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I can’t imagine that anyone else is actually still reading/voting so these are my predictions and favourite.

So I said I thought it was too close to call for 6 of them, these are the 6 I was talking about:

It's Coming
First Responders
Gondolier
The Stowaway
The Libertine
Diversion Down Elder Tree Lane

The 2 that I thought would probably rise to the top of that pile are:

It's Coming
The Stowaway

My personal favourite was It's Coming, but I'd say that The Stowaway will take the Writer's Choice. Like I said in a previous post, no real stand-outs this time round, just a few scripts that did certain things really well.



Revision History (1 edits)
Warren  -  May 2nd, 2019, 10:50pm
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stevie
Posted: May 2nd, 2019, 10:47pm Report to Moderator
Of The Ancients



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Lib I tend to say ‘bird’ or ‘chick’ more than ‘sheila’ lol



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LC
Posted: May 3rd, 2019, 12:25am Report to Moderator
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Quoted from stevie
Lib I tend to say ‘bird’ or ‘chick’ more than ‘sheila’ lol

Stevie, I stand corrected.  


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Matthew Taylor
Posted: May 3rd, 2019, 4:27am Report to Moderator
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The 4 that topped my list

Gondolier
The stowaway
The Libertine
Beyond the sea

Looks like it will be close for sure


Feature

42.2

Two steps to writing a good screenplay:
1) Write a bad one
2) Fix it
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leitskev
Posted: May 3rd, 2019, 7:42am Report to Moderator
Of The Ancients


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Dena and I submitted one. It was slapped together though. I had an idea, she liked it. I don't even have Final Draft anymore, been that long. Thursday while watching the Celts I put together some notes. I finished them Fri morning before heading to Boston for the doctors to find out the results of my scans. What I sent Dena was really just notes, I hoped she could turn it into a script, but she was traveling with her family. From the backseat of the car, she merely converted my notes to script. Later she sent it to me, but by then I was drinking heavily with friends and family to celebrate my good scans. I never saw the draft until Sat. So we apologize for anyone who had to slog through it. The crappy product is my fault not Dena's.

Kinda cool to be back in, though. Been a lot of years. The writing has improved generally. I didn't find any pissers. There were several I read but didn't review because I couldn't find anything constructive to say. I never really understood how "congratulations for finishing the OWC" really helps anyone.

I did learn some things, things that can be applied to any form of storywriting.

1) when possible start with as few named characters as you can and introduce them slowly.
2) when you intro a new character try to have him/her doing some kind of action in that moment. It makes them easier to remember. We often make the mistake of trying to make supporting characters easier to remember by giving them distinct physical characteristics. But what sticks better in the readers mind is to have them performing some action, or involved in some action. I'm not just talking about action pertinent to the story, that's a given. Let's say your opening scene is a high school football team's practice. And you want to intro a secondary character. If he's doing something distinct he'll be easier to remember. Maybe he warms up with ballet moves.
3) clear action is much easier to follow. Like the spider vs the trucker in Stowaway. So what happens when we want to do something more complicated? Maybe an approach is to start with clear, simple action, and then once that's established expand the story.

Thanks for reading our crap!
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Matthew Taylor
Posted: May 3rd, 2019, 8:09am Report to Moderator
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Shakespeare's county
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Quoted from leitskev
Dena and I submitted one. It was slapped together though. I had an idea, she liked it. I don't even have Final Draft anymore, been that long. Thursday while watching the Celts I put together some notes. I finished them Fri morning before heading to Boston for the doctors to find out the results of my scans. What I sent Dena was really just notes, I hoped she could turn it into a script, but she was traveling with her family. From the backseat of the car, she merely converted my notes to script. Later she sent it to me, but by then I was drinking heavily with friends and family to celebrate my good scans. I never saw the draft until Sat. So we apologize for anyone who had to slog through it. The crappy product is my fault not Dena's.

Kinda cool to be back in, though. Been a lot of years. The writing has improved generally. I didn't find any pissers. There were several I read but didn't review because I couldn't find anything constructive to say. I never really understood how "congratulations for finishing the OWC" really helps anyone.

I did learn some things, things that can be applied to any form of storywriting.

1) when possible start with as few named characters as you can and introduce them slowly.
2) when you intro a new character try to have him/her doing some kind of action in that moment. It makes them easier to remember. We often make the mistake of trying to make supporting characters easier to remember by giving them distinct physical characteristics. But what sticks better in the readers mind is to have them performing some action, or involved in some action. I'm not just talking about action pertinent to the story, that's a given. Let's say your opening scene is a high school football team's practice. And you want to intro a secondary character. If he's doing something distinct he'll be easier to remember. Maybe he warms up with ballet moves.
3) clear action is much easier to follow. Like the spider vs the trucker in Stowaway. So what happens when we want to do something more complicated? Maybe an approach is to start with clear, simple action, and then once that's established expand the story.

Thanks for reading our crap!


Ah! I know which one it is - I won't say in case others haven't figured it out - but I'm sure most of the results are in any way.

The "Congratulations" are usually a sign off after other comments - They are just a pat on the back for taking on a challenge which can be difficult for a lot of writers, me included.


Feature

42.2

Two steps to writing a good screenplay:
1) Write a bad one
2) Fix it
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Britman
Posted: May 3rd, 2019, 8:11am Report to Moderator
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What time are results posted today?


Producer/Director of The Dollmaker by Matias Caruso
Producer/Director of So Pretty/Dark by James Williams
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Matthew Taylor
Posted: May 3rd, 2019, 8:13am Report to Moderator
January Project Group



Location
Shakespeare's county
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1770
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Quoted from Britman
What time are results posted today?


I don't think they are - deadline for submitting scores is today. Gotta give Don time to count 'em up and take out any self votes


Feature

42.2

Two steps to writing a good screenplay:
1) Write a bad one
2) Fix it
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eldave1
Posted: May 3rd, 2019, 9:44am Report to Moderator
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Location
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My top 4 )no particular order):

Libertine
Reap What You Sow
Stowaway
Rub or Wear


My Scripts can all be seen here:

http://dlambertson.wix.com/scripts
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Dreamscale
Posted: May 3rd, 2019, 10:16am Report to Moderator
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My fave...

Stevie Rubs One Off In Public
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leitskev
Posted: May 3rd, 2019, 10:16am Report to Moderator
Of The Ancients


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I didn't read enough to vote. I thought Stowaway was extremely well written. A writer of that talent should be able to find work doing some kind of writing.

There was another one, I forget the name, maybe Reap What You Sow, where the girl is run over by the tractor, that was a very, very good effort.

Some of the WWII ones were promising concepts that needed another pass on the writing.

Libertine seemed like the work of a sophisticated writer. However, the story is not executed in a way that holds the reader's attention. Also, the story seems to begin by highlighting the superstitions and the racial prejudices of the ship's crew, who think one of the slaves is a witch. But then it confirms their prejudices by supplying the murderous witch. Her killings were justified, but it still tends to uphold the prejudices.

ALL of the ones I read were better than our submission, which is my fault not Dena's, so hopefully I don't sound critical.
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Dreamscale
Posted: May 3rd, 2019, 10:19am Report to Moderator
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Favorite Slug (by far)...

SUBMARINE BEDROOM

2nd favorite Slug...

INT. FRONT WINDOW
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Matthew Taylor
Posted: May 3rd, 2019, 10:50am Report to Moderator
January Project Group



Location
Shakespeare's county
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1770
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Favourite Title: Reap What You Sow

Favourite piece of dialogue:


Quoted Text
RED
You're just an itsy bitsy spider.
...
RED
That went up the wrong water spout.
...
RED
So down came the pain..
...
RED
And blasted that ugly, freak-ofmother-fuckin-nature out!


Favourite WTF moment: The ending of Driving the Relm

Favourite moment of the challenge: Seeing Jeff's comment on my entry and realising that this time, HE MANAGED TO READ THE WHOLE DAMN THING! Woohoo


Feature

42.2

Two steps to writing a good screenplay:
1) Write a bad one
2) Fix it
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Dreamscale
Posted: May 3rd, 2019, 11:00am Report to Moderator
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Quoted from Matthew Taylor

Favourite moment of the challenge: Seeing Jeff's comment on my entry and realising that this time, HE MANAGED TO READ THE WHOLE DAMN THING! Woohoo


Hope I gave it a good review.

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