I certainly hope the script is as good as the title page! Ha ha! Title should be in all caps, but then again, you're bestselling author Jessica Fletcher.
No bold slugs. Whew! That's a relief.
First slug is flawless.
Nice intro.
Perspex * trademark * solid transparent plastic made of polymethyl methacrylate (the same material as plexiglas or lucite). I added a new word to my vocab. Thanks.
"[...]separates him from[]"
Apparently, Pneuma is a real name? I keep thinking pneumonia, lol.
"Rose Garden [A]partments," if this is a proper name.
Celebrates what? Can this be filmed?
That's more like it.
"Oh[,] yes[; or ,] it's a good day."
"Wanting to avoid talking about it[...]" Unfilmable?
"The Astaire Drainage [C]ase" is a proper name, thus needs to be capped.
"Quick" or "quickly" is fine.
"Local publication[,] I think."
Unsure about that parenthetical. Should be kept to one line if used.
"Yeah, well[,]"
Thirteen-line chunk of dialogue on page 3. Might want to break it up. I know he's on the phone, but still.
"Mr[.] Astaire," but it should be "Mister."
Love that line, "[Mister] Knows-fuck-all!"
Another great, profane line. Love it!
Clearly a professional writer, and a damn good one.
P5
Normally, no bold or italic, but it works here.
P6
(V.O.) not (VO)
Page break needs (MORE) (CONTINUED) and (CONT'D).
P7
What's your budget for all that?
P8
A red "what" provides the light?
Despite a few niggles noted above, this was quite good.
Recommend. A+ 8/10