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SimplyScripts Screenwriting Discussion Board    Discussion of...     General Chat  ›  Billy the bomb finished shooting Moderators: bert
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  Author    Billy the bomb finished shooting  (currently 2193 views)
AtholForsyth
Posted: June 29th, 2014, 6:26am Report to Moderator
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Hi there, some of you will remember my script 'Billy the bomb'. Well anyway I've finished shooting it so I thought I'd share a clip from it. To put people that haven't read it in the know, it's about a bent cop.

The clip that I'm going to show you is the ending.

'Billy the bomb' is the guy not wearing a suit.

To cut a long story short, 'Billy has been up to some crazy shit like selling crystal meth from an ice cream van, running hookers and murdering a traffic warden.

The guy in the suit is Billy's boss. He doesn't know that Billy's bent  and thinks he's worthy of his badge.

Anyway enjoy and if you want to know anything about shooting editing or whatever , just give me a shout.

Cheers

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8NFAjd3rBPA


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Don  -  June 29th, 2014, 9:47am
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CalebHart
Posted: June 29th, 2014, 7:51am Report to Moderator
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Should be titled the F-bomb.  You've got enough of them.    Production value looks good though.  Smooth camera movemement.  Did you do the cinematography yourself or hire somebody?

My only other gripe;  You should've had the traffic warden's brother pull up next to Billy in the end and put a bullet in his head.  Bad Lieutnant (Harvey Keitel version of course-)type ending.

Congrats on finishing your project.

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DustinBowcot
Posted: June 29th, 2014, 11:49am Report to Moderator
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At 26 seconds I can actually hear people talking in the background. Some of those peaks are too peaky. Sound continuity is off around 1.35 with the dialogue, every time you cut from one person to the next the background noises are completely different. Every time a car door shuts it threatens to burst an ear drum.

You should try layering. Record dialogue  and even ambient sounds separately and layer it on afterwards. At the moment it's really spoiling the film.
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AtholForsyth
Posted: June 29th, 2014, 1:45pm Report to Moderator
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Hey Dustin, I said I'd just finished shooting it. If the film was all done and dusted, I would have posted the whole thing. It's easy to level the sound out, just not been done yet. focus on the good bits mofo, I'm here to help.
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DustinBowcot
Posted: June 29th, 2014, 3:49pm Report to Moderator
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Levels are not going to sort out the continuity issues.
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Dressel
Posted: June 29th, 2014, 4:22pm Report to Moderator
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Quoted from AtholForsyth

focus on the good bits mofo, I'm here to help.


It kind of sounds like you're here to get unequivocal praise...


CHECK OUT MY WEB SERIES

The Pilot is Dead

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Forgive
Posted: June 29th, 2014, 6:25pm Report to Moderator
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Quoted from Dressel
It kind of sounds like you're here to get unequivocal praise...


He's not... Dustin, as usual, is being an unequivocal dick, which he likes to do in order to get attention. He's like a 3-year old with learning disabilities - so he really can't help it.

Athol - this is well filmed, so congrats on that. It does look a little like you had separate mics on each camera, but it also looks like a rough edit so I don't know if you had a separate mic ready to go, but if not, dubbing might sort out the issues, so I don't think sound will kill this. Couldn't hear any intrusive chat at .26 either.

The 'Boss' guy put in a really solid performance there too - and yeah the car doors were REALLY loud; I'm sure you can sort that out though. I'm impressed by the way this is working out TBH - your cinematography's the strongest point. Best of luck with it.

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AtholForsyth
Posted: June 30th, 2014, 12:19am Report to Moderator
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Dressel, what you talking about? I wrote this script in here, I told people I would come back in when I'd shot it so anyone thinking of shooting their first film like me could maybe gain something out of it. I'm not here blowing my own trumpet.

Thanks Forgive and this is a rough edit. I shot this on one camera using a shotgun mic on a boom. When setting up different camera angles, the boom has to be moved so the ambient sound changes. Something that someone else will have to sort out. As for the car doors being loud, that's a real easy fix and just something that I never really noticed.

Dustin, I don't mind constructive criticism but I know what you're like. You would try to start a fight in an empty room. Don't get me started.

BTW Sound continuity is not off at 1.35 . It may look off but I can assure you it's not. It's the Scottish voice that maybe makes it look like it. He actually says ' I tell you what, there should be more folk like you in the force, you're a credit to your badge'

It's the 'I'll tell you what' bit that maybe looks off because he says it fast, but that's a Scottish accent for you. As for the other bit you said, 0.26 or whatever seems fine to me, I cant hear other people. Maybe it's the voices in your head.

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AtholForsyth  -  June 30th, 2014, 12:33am
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Scoob
Posted: June 30th, 2014, 1:00am Report to Moderator
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Congratulations on completing this job, Athol. Brilliant.
However...

I have to say I think the acting is a bit... shoddy? Maybe the way the dialogue is spoken, seems a tad too forced. Unnatural. The movement of the camera is pretty cool, every thing else seems nicely set up. Gotta agree the sound needs fixing.

On another note, I don't think Dustin has said anything untoward against this clip. Forgive said the same thing, but only in a more ... receptable/polite way. Apart from his unneeded disrespectful comment about Dustin, Forgive basically said the same thing he did.

Still, looking forward to seeing this finished, Athol! Good luck, man!




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Scoob  -  June 30th, 2014, 1:11am
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Guest
Posted: June 30th, 2014, 2:30am Report to Moderator
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Why does it always seem that cool or crooked cops always rock the tropical t-shirts in cool/crooked cop movies? haha
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DustinBowcot
Posted: June 30th, 2014, 2:44am Report to Moderator
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I gave some really great advice on how to deal with the sound. I had a lesson from a professional, we've just done it on my own film.

First we'd do a take with video and sound. Then we'd do a take just for sound recording (no video at all, just actors delivering dialogue and/or ambient sounds). This is so, in your editing suite, you can layer the sounds onto the video afterwards. Purely because of continuity issues when you switch from one take to the next in the edit.

Forgive actually assumed he was using mic's on two different cameras. It's obviously a shotgun mic (I bought a Rode NTG2 shotgun mic for our shoot) but what's happened is sound has been recorded while filming two separate takes that are then edited together. Obviously outdoors this will lead to major sound continuity issues, a bus going past in take 1 isn't going to be there for take 2. You edit those together then flick back and forth equals a major sound issue.

If you had a separate sound file, you can layer it on afterwards and not suffer the continuity issues. So record ambient sounds too. Have it a separate file, then strip out all sound from the video and layer the sounds on individually.
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CalebHart
Posted: June 30th, 2014, 6:46am Report to Moderator
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Hmm.  It appears my comment at the top of the thread has been overlooked.  Bloody heck!  
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AtholForsyth
Posted: June 30th, 2014, 7:32am Report to Moderator
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Hiya Celeb, Good idea on the ending with Billy getting a gun to his head, I might use it, as for the camera work that was done by me.

Fuck Bomb
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CalebHart
Posted: June 30th, 2014, 8:20am Report to Moderator
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Quoted from AtholForsyth
Hiya Celeb, Good idea on the ending with Billy getting a gun to his head...


Yep.  Just seems like it might be a fitting end for your wayward cop.  

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hbvM10EFOoQ

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AtholForsyth
Posted: June 30th, 2014, 4:01pm Report to Moderator
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Celeb, thats a cool scene for sure, I might change it to the traffic warden's brother walks up to Billy's car asking for change for the meter. Billy's head boils coz he hates traffic warderns but he looks for change anyway....words are exchanged.....I'll think of the end later.......Word
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