Descriptions need some work. The thing with SCI-FI is it's easy to lose a reader so you have to pay more attention to the details and how things are described. Some typos here and there. For the most part, it's written well but I was pretty much lost throughout.

Lots of sci-fi this time around.  Takes a deft hand to build a world in ten pages and focus the plot into a satisfying whole.  I like the escape and evade angle—that’s simple enough.  Get us on board with the characters and make us want to see them triumph or at least gain some pyrrhic victory.  I could follow that much.  But then start throwing in attacking wolves and rattle snakes, and the Enforcers drawn to the organic life at the end and I just couldn’t tie it all together to appreciate the intent.

Visual writing for the most part (opening was tricky to follow) but it conveyed a sense of urgency with a pace that crackles along.  Criteria was met and then some—maybe to the detriment of the story—like you were trying to cram too much in there.  Less is more given the space to work with.

For me this was okay, but a big idea that’s perhaps best explored without the constraints.

Good luck.

Code Blood dripping from Ward's head...

-

Blood drips from Ward's head.

Always choose the most active voice.

Some strange word choices in this story often have me thinking... wtf, why?

Code SNOW whipping past the ship, now curled...

How is the snow curled? Or, do you mean the ship is curled?

Criteria Met (Y/N) – I don't care.
Story (1-5) –  1.5
Characters (1-5) – 2
Dialogue (1-5) – 2
Writing (1-5) – 2
Overall (1-10) – 3.75