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SimplyScripts Screenwriting Discussion Board    One Week Challenge    May 2010 One Week Challenge  ›  OWC - Of Cannibals and Cabins
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  Author    OWC - Of Cannibals and Cabins  (currently 4182 views)
Sandra Elstree.
Posted: May 21st, 2010, 12:13pm Report to Moderator
Of The Ancients


What if the Hokey Pokey, IS what it's all about?

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Quoted from stevie
I know nothing of the source material but this gave me a few laughs.

For some reason, the line when the guy electrocutes the other guy then throws water on him to wake him up, made me laugh out loud.

I think this was done on Word to throw out a red herring.


Me too. I definitely think the writer should keep working with comedy because:

DR. SMITH
Yes, I thought you were dead.  I need to make sure…

Dr. Smith pulls out doctor stuff and checks out Ian.

Dr. SMITH (CONT.)
By God, he is alive!  I should know, I’m a doctor.

Funny stuff in here.

Sandra




A known mistake is better than an unknown truth.
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Dreamscale
Posted: May 21st, 2010, 1:17pm Report to Moderator
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"doctor stuff" - Love it!  Where'd he pull this "stuff" out from?

Also, wonder if "Dr. Smith" is from the old "Lost in Space" series.  That guy was hilarious!
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George Willson
Posted: May 21st, 2010, 3:04pm Report to Moderator
Of The Ancients


Doctor who? Yes, quite right.

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I will have to say that I was amused, primarily because of the notoriety of the Cabin, and the fact that I attempted to write a sequel to it recently that was nowhere near as bad as the original. This one toes the line at the original's badness. It's completely random.

That being said, if I were to take this one seriously, it would be considered a load of crap...because it is. I'm a writer. I should know. I only got a kick out of it because I picked up right from the beginning what you were doing.

You just have to know The Cabin to have any appreciate for this. Or anti-appreciation in this case.


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Dreamscale
Posted: May 21st, 2010, 4:29pm Report to Moderator
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What about Chris Halverson's Cannibal?  Nobody remembers that classic script?  The hermit cannibal Ejijah who flew through trees like a flying fox?  The cousin of Ian Pitt/ The harvesting of cocaine and smoking it in the fields?  The tits just hanging there?

I think it actually puts the Cabin to shame.
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nawazm11
Posted: February 2nd, 2012, 9:22pm Report to Moderator
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Sorry about bumping this up but this was bloody hilarious.

For a pisstake, this has to be the funniest one I've read. "WAZ UP, BITCHES?" Hahaha, just too funny.

My favourite line though, "Ian kills the dog with a cross bow.  The arrow goes into his mouth and out his anus". Oh god, I couldn't stop laughing after that.

Revision History (1 edits)
nawazm11  -  August 8th, 2012, 9:09pm
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Dreamscale
Posted: February 2nd, 2012, 9:40pm Report to Moderator
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Thank you, MO...thank you very much!

It seems like this didn't go over too well, but I gotta admit that every so often I'll read this and it always puts me in a better mood.  Glad I can at least make myself laugh.

Glad you enjoyed it as well.  I'm gonna read it again now, as I'm a little down at the moment.

Thanks for the read and feedback.
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Reef Dreamer
Posted: February 6th, 2012, 10:26am Report to Moderator
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Hey Jeff,

Had to check out a piss take script from you - i wasn't around here at the time.

Never had you down for comedy but this is solid stuff, bearing in mind the target audience for this. Beyond us lot the jokes wouldn't always hit the spot.

It is also, surprising as it may seem, actually subtle in part. I don't have any notes to hand and i read it the other day, but nice touches such as ending dialogue with the meaningless ... ,though. Plus the interchange of line spacing in the the whole text and in the dialogue. Little touches throughout.

I quite like the camera man winking to the audience, may use that some day in another spoof script. Kind of reminded me of the Police Squad series when Frank walks around the wall of the film set, every time. i still laughed.

My one problem with this was it could have been very clever and funny but lost some of it as it was 100% full on. I appreciate that was your aim but it would be nice to see a cleaner version with more story - as though a real attempt which fails badly.

In the UK there was a comedian called Les Dawson, an old fashioned working man stand up comic. One of his trade marks was playing the piano badly. However, before you can play the piano badly you must be able to play it brilliantly. It was all about on or two wrong notes just at the right time, rather than every note being crashed into the piano.

I was going to say i hope i see another one of these but having thought about it....


My scripts  HERE

The Elevator Most Belonging To Alice - Semi Final Bluecat, Runner Up Nashville
Inner Journey - Page Awards Finalist - Bluecat semi final
Grieving Spell - winner - London Film Awards.  Third - Honolulu
Ultimate Weapon - Fresh Voices - second place
IMDb link... http://www.imdb.com/name/nm7062725/?ref_=tt_ov_wr
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Dreamscale
Posted: February 6th, 2012, 11:02am Report to Moderator
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Hey Bill, thanks for the read and feedback.

The humor of this piece is in the source material - 2 scripts on SS that are so God awful, IMO, they're fucking brilliant.  The funny thing is that the authors had no idea how bad their writing was, and humor was the last thing they were going for.  Truly classic stuff, especially in Chris Halvorson's Cannibal.  Everyone should read that script when they need a laugh.

Lots of peeps hated this, as well as my other 2 giant pissers from this OWC, but as I've said before, they were very liberating to write, and they still give me more than a few chuckles when I resurrect them and give them a read.  I can easily see where some, if not the vast majority won't get them, or downright hate them.  Maybe one has to be in the right frame of mind?  Yes, that always helps.  

Thanks, man!
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MarkItZero
Posted: February 16th, 2017, 6:09pm Report to Moderator
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Wow, people gave you a lot of hate for this all the way back in 2010. Even then, they wanted the legend to disappear. But it hasn't... cuz I just brought it back.

A+ Hoagie references.


That rug really tied the room together.
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Dreamscale
Posted: February 16th, 2017, 7:32pm Report to Moderator
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Quoted from MarkItZero
Wow, people gave you a lot of hate for this all the way back in 2010. Even then, they wanted the legend to disappear. But it hasn't... cuz I just brought it back.

A+ Hoagie references.




HaHa!!  YES!!!  The classic lives!

Thanks for the bump, brother!!!

Yeah, peeps HATED it, but...you know what?  Literally every time I pull this up, I get in such a great mood.

There is 1 more I wrote, which is ...I think...a sequel to this one.

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