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Dark and disturbing, but well executed. I keep entertaining myself with my review puns. A very aptly named lead character is Victor with shades of American Psycho and Silence of the Lambs.
Ginger (30) a thick and gorgeous redhead. Thick?
denies his advance. rejects his advances, perhaps?
To quote Margaret Atwood (sort of...)
'Men are afraid that women will laugh at them. Women are afraid that men will kill them.'
The actual genesis of the quote is a bit more complicated than that but it sums up this short. As did Rene, perfectly.
I keep wondering what might have happened had one of the women not rejected him.
I did start to get a little mixed up with how many women there were by the end. Streamlining might help.
I don't know... It's gruesome and horrible and there's a strange fascination (like a car crash) with the endless portrayal of women (particularly on film, but sadly in real life too) as victims of horrible violent crimes committed by men. Might have been nice to see one of these women get away and point the finger at him in the end.
But then that would have defeated the simplicity with this plot.
Might have been different to reverse the sexes for a change too?
Just thinking out loud... It's written well, but I have no inclination to watch it, or my proposed gender-reversed version.
Horror is not my favorite genre but those who like gore will love this because it does have plenty of blood and guts and mutilations.
What might have made it better though is to give us some back story, however brief, of your protagonist so we'll know why he's so obsessed with the phrase "she loves me/she loves me not." I was actually waiting to see either (1) a woman that did love him although then we wouldn't have seen what he did to them, or (2) a female saying "he loves me not" and kills him.
Regardless, you've written a good short horror. Congrats!
Now that one was dark, really like the way you twisted an innocent game of removing petals from a flower to this absolute horror show. Was overall decently written and was really creative with your dialogue.
It got a bit repetitious with your second act and I think with that much gore, it might suffer from diminishing returns by the reveal.
This was a great entry that i think adhered to the challenge, good job writer and good luck.
Okay, you two. I just read it for the third time. The garbage truck thing, I still don't get, but since you explained it to me, perhaps making that a little more clear in the rewrite. I read all the comments and I'm not sure everyone else got the significance of it either.