No hint at the age of the adult characters?! Normally I wouldn't care, but we need to know how far the flashback goes.

So a corpse, in a wet environment filled with bacteria and critters, still has flesh on it ten or more years later? This makes me really want to stop reading. I'm struggling for a damn reason to push past that. I had to stop and go back twice to see if I missed something. The rest will get the obligatory skim.

Why do they call the ghost a spectre when it can only be heard?

Well, I suppose this story will win because it's beyond my brain power to get. Congrats on your victory.

An absurdist piece of you know what. The most offensive part of this story is Coach Dobbs’ believing the kids when they told him he was going to meet the ghosts of three sports legends. At least try to make the characters somewhat realistic no matter the situation. As far as the kids being homicidal at such a young age, this was the only believable part of the script. Also, I don’t think the writer tried to inject any humor into the story and succeeded brilliantly.

Hi
I don't have anything exciting to say about this entry. I had hard time getting it in the first place. I understand it's your type of funny.

I get this is a pisser and I applaud it for having a real go at something outrageous and different.

But that isn't my sense of humour, so unfortunately it didn;t work for me.

Or, tbf, almost didn't... the end kills made me chuckle.

Hi Writer,

Nope, this wasn't for me. I applaud the effort, but violent, gratuitous deaths and whistles in the ass (hope this was the last...) are not my kind of humor, sorry.

Good effort anyway,
David

Quoted from Philostrate Hi Writer, Nope, this wasn't for me. I applaud the effort, but violent, gratuitous deaths and whistles in the ass (hope this was the last...) are not my kind of humor, sorry. Good effort anyway, David

I must be reading these scripts in the wrong order. God, this happens again?

As for this script, the over-the-top violence is a kind of comedy I guess (The recently rebooted Tick series has an antihero Overkill who embodies this particular kind of sight gag). People still aren't going to stick around through an extended slow-motion shot, however.

Quoted from FrankM People still aren't going to stick around through an extended slow-motion shot, however.

One of the true highlights of the script.

I think you aren't getting what this is...and how it works.  Too bad...

Love the title... and love the logline. Good job there!

I really appreciate HOW you intro your characters because we know exactly how they are. Who cares what they are wearing or how they are built... your descriptions are short and to the point. VERY well done here.

The Flashback does not have an end so it was confusing the read for me.

A ghost of the PE coach? This is going off the rails for me.

Sorry this was not one of my favorites. I didn't find the humor.

I really hope this was an intentional pisser but I'm not so sure it was. I didn't find it funny nor engrossing in any way. And what's up with 'EUNICE, that one black friend'? What a bizarre character introduction.

It’s not the best although it does have promise.

I would question the character Eunice who as a black character is interrupted before he can speak and is then subsequently killed.  It might not look go down well with some people.

The humour was lacking.  The story could be punched up if it used some Ghostbuster inspired things.

Gym Coaches Blow

Very absurd. The construction of the story is weird and makes no sense. Anyway, the second half was pretty entertaining. Idiotic but good. I liked it.