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SimplyScripts Screenwriting Discussion Board    Unproduced Screenplay Discussion    Action/Adventure Scripts  ›  The King's Court Moderators: bert
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  Author    The King's Court  (currently 2155 views)
Don
Posted: January 2nd, 2014, 4:27pm Report to Moderator
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So, what are you writing?

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The King's Court by Brandon Montgomery - Action, Adventure - Framed for the king's murder, a loyal assassin must battle former allies to place the kingdom’s reluctant heir on the throne, or fall to the darkness of the treacherous prince. 113 pages - pdf, format


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NickSedario
Posted: January 2nd, 2014, 5:15pm Report to Moderator
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I can't stand this particular genre, but at a glance this is a very well written script.  Props for that.   Hopefully the writer will get involved with the SS community and recieve some useful feedback.  Doesn't look like you need much help though.   Best of luck with it.
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happywash
Posted: April 28th, 2014, 3:22pm Report to Moderator
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I, too, am enthralled by the story and the pace of the script. I know this is a small thing, but it is a common spelling mistake (and I'm sure you've fixed it by now), but it's "peek" not "peak." It's done a couple of times in the first five pages. I was into the flow, but those little things tripped me up.

In my opinion, because you have such a decent grasp on screenwriting, I would suggest spending just a bit more time proofing. Because your story, dialogue, and flow didn't trip me up, the spelling errors did. They will stand out more because the other elements are good.

Of course, people will overlook things if the story is good. I'm still reading (just got past the time jump... which I'm wondering if it's needed... I'll withhold judgement). But why not make things squeaky clean? I'm embarrassed to say that the script I put up has typos in it. I did another pass of my script last night, and caught about 10 of them. Then I had someone else do a pass and they caught another five.

It's the biggest pain in the butt, but I do it to make sure I can stand out amongst others. You already have an advantage in that you can write, so why not give yourself that extra 2% by proofing just a little bit more? (I know I'm a hypocrite... I put my script up the way it was because I wanted some feedback before I submitted to the Nicholl).

I'm going to keep reading, and come back when I have some thoughts on story, character, etc.
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