I don't know if this should be in a separate thread, but I was reading in the SS newsletter that some werewolf feature made a sale.

The thing is the script is only 52 pages because of very, very little dialogue.

Is that good or bad?

Carson was asking the question is 52 the new 110?

What's everyone think...

52 pages?  Well, if it's filled with action it could easily hit 1hr10mins, but even that's short for a feature.  Sounds like a bad thing to me, but I'm no pro-critic.

Dialogue takes up lots of space. The dialogue-free short I wrote comes in at 8 pages, I bet when we film it it will be closer to twelve minutes... or even fifteen. The fight scenes have been taken completely out of my hands. I've learned a valuable lesson about action in a screenplay... whatever I write will not be utilised once the fight choreographers get hold of it. Also, when I've written a fight scene these guys can make it last as long as they like. I can't wait to make that film, it's going to be huge.

You may also find when you read a dialogue-free or low dialogue screenplay that it feels like it has taken longer to read.

The average screenplay comes in around 15000 words... did anyone count the words in the werewolf thing? That's assuming dialogue could be comparable to action on a word for word basis, which I don't think it can.

The Robert Redford film, All Is Lost, is 107 minutes long... yet the script is only 32 pages. But it is, essentially, dialogue free. Hence how such a short page count resulted in a standard length film.

Sofia Coppola's film, Somewhere, is similar: 98 minutes long, but only 44 pages. But that has scenes which are a few lines in the script, but last for minutes (the ice skating scene, the slow zoom shot of the protag and his daughter by the swimming pool, etc.). So this is a more interesting point; if this script had been directed by somewhere who leans towards faster cuts, shorter scenes, and snappier editing, the script would have translated to a much shorter film. But as it is, what with Sofia Coppola favouring longer takes and slower scenes, a short script became a normal length film.

Quoted from Guest I don't know if this should be in a separate thread, but I was reading in the SS newsletter that some werewolf feature made a sale. The thing is the script is only 52 pages because of very, very little dialogue. Is that good or bad? Carson was asking the question is 52 the new 110? What's everyone think...

The script is Yellowstone Falls.  But from what I've read, it's not actually a werewolf script, it's about a mother wolf protecting her cubs from mutant humans after the apocalypse.  As far as the 52 page thing, I think that has more to do with the fact that there is very little to no dialogue.  And, this is a writer who's sold many scripts before this one, plus is repped by a powerful agency, so I think that gives you a good deal more leeway in the material you put out.

Best of luck demento

Quoted from Reef Dreamer Best of luck demento

Thanks man.

Good luck Brother!!!!!

Enjoy the ride.

Shawn.....><

Quoted from Ledbetter Good luck Brother!!!!! Enjoy the ride. Shawn.....><

Thanks man.

I think it's a losing battle though. Judging from the first set of comments. From what I can tell it's between my script and a script called "The Devil's Hammer". Seems a bit like that guy has a fan base, seeing as there are a few reviews that are very favorable towards his script and don't mention any of the rest that are in the running. Plus he won some contest (I don't even have a credit/debit card to enter one. - lol). I think best case scenario, I come in with the second amount of votes.

But we press ON!

Support for the next potential candidate from Simply Scripts - REPRESENT

I don't like your logline.

Code A man retreats to his secluded cabin to commit suicide. His plans are delayed when movie characters start showing up.

It needs more and is not written very well. Especially the first sentence... but there should be a way to make both sentences, just one.

In a secluded cabin, a man's suicide attempt is rudely interrupted when famous movie characters start showing up.

What type of man is he? What type of movie stars are they? What do they do when they get there? For example:

In a secluded cabin, a lonely old man's suicide attempt is rudely interrupted when B-Rated movie stars suddenly appear and try to talk him out of it.


Something like that. Make it better... do you still have time?

Quoted from Dustiin Something like that. Make it better... do you still have time?

Seeing a it's been on Scriptshadow for a couple of days I'd say it's unlikely.

I quite like his logline. Over there there are some who do. It's all opinion.

R

Quoted from rendevous It's all opinion.

I speak for the masses.... I mean, the missus...

Seriously though, I only want to help. The pitch is pretty weak. Looking it over now and it's been rushed. Your first time though so it's to be expected.

You usually only get out what you put in. The logline and following pitch are where you get to show off a little. Yeah, you may have guys mentioning about this bullshit win or that bullshit win but that's just bullshit. The question is asking why people should read your story. Tell them.

Here's the entire pitch:

Quoted Text TITLE: A Cinematic End GENRE: Contained Thriller/ Dark Comedy LOGLINE: A man retreats to his secluded cabin to commit suicide. His plans are delayed when movie characters start showing up. WHY YOU SHOULD READ: Because the logline grabbed your attention. I also whipped up this poster to get some additional interest going: http://imgur.com/LW8xcSq

It's assuming the reader's attention has been grabbed by the logline. Mine hasn't... but it's subjective. On the one hand there could be some decent wit at play in this feature, but if so, then why doesn't the logline deliver better? Why hasn't the writer used the space available to sell this script?

Here's another pitch, and I'm not going to pick the best one:

Quoted Text TITLE: Knit Wits.pdf) GENRE: Comedy LOGLINE: After the passing of their mother, three estranged brothers must reunite and take over the family knitting business. WHY YOU SHOULD READ: “Knit Wits” is a cross between “Horrible Bosses” and “Silver Linings Playbook.” It’s an edgy comedy with a lot of heart that focuses on three men running a knitting business. Now, I tried to learn how to knit in order to do some research before writing the script, but it was a total nightmare. Much of that frustration is showcased in this spec. Knitting is not for me. However, writing about it in a comedic way is much more my style and a hell of a lot more fun!

I wouldn't read it as it's not my thing... but it is sold far better. The pitch is sound and the logline is great. A logline is not like a screenplay. If something can fit into one sentence then you shouldn't use two... it just seems unprofessional... but again, that's only my opinion

I speak for the mosses. And the spoons.

R

Congrats, Demento. Just getting nominated is an accomplishment that could lead to something else. Best of luck.