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SimplyScripts Screenwriting Discussion Board    Screenwriting Discussion    Simplyscripts Collaborative Effort  ›  The 2010 Simply Script 7 week Feature challenge Moderators: Mr. Blonde
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  Author    The 2010 Simply Script 7 week Feature challenge  (currently 36840 views)
Coding Herman
Posted: August 30th, 2010, 9:10pm Report to Moderator
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Thanks, Michael and Jeff.

Yeah, my guy is running and talking on the phone at the same time. Luckily both characters on the phone are in their same respective location throughout the conversation.

Okay, so what happen if one of the guys, especially the running one, goes from int. to ext.? I guess I'll have to use different slugs then.

I really want to show both sides for this conversation, instead of using V.O. and going back, because both characters discover things while they're talking.

I'm on page 96 right now. Haven't written much today. Planned to go up to 98 by tonight. Averaging 5 pages per day so far.


FEATURE:

Memwipe
- Sci-Fi, Action, Thriller (114 pages) - In a world where memories can be erased by request, a Memory Erasing Specialist desperately searches for the culprit when his wife becomes a target for erasure -- with his former colleagues hot on his trail.
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Dreamscale
Posted: August 30th, 2010, 9:32pm Report to Moderator
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Cool, Herman, you're almost there for sure, then!

If your running guy changes from INT to EXT or whatever, you'll definitely need a new SLUG, and IMO, that represents a problem for an INTERCUT scene, because, as far as I know, an INTERCUT scene is "INTERCUTTING between 2 established scenes, or settings.

Michael Cornetto?  Your turn...
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mcornetto
Posted: August 30th, 2010, 9:55pm Report to Moderator
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I will agree that a new INTERCUT is needed if one of the characters majorly changes location or you can change location and then supply a new intercut.

INT A
INTERCUT EXT B
stuff happens B changes to INT
INTERCUT INT B

or

INT A
INTERCUT EXT B
stuff happens B changes to INT
INT B
INTERCUT INT A

But remember it's about readability, formatting isn't about being dogmatic it's about making your script understandable.

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mcornetto  -  August 30th, 2010, 10:05pm
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Coding Herman
Posted: August 30th, 2010, 10:01pm Report to Moderator
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Oh, I see. Thanks so much.


FEATURE:

Memwipe
- Sci-Fi, Action, Thriller (114 pages) - In a world where memories can be erased by request, a Memory Erasing Specialist desperately searches for the culprit when his wife becomes a target for erasure -- with his former colleagues hot on his trail.
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George Willson
Posted: August 31st, 2010, 7:56am Report to Moderator
Of The Ancients


Doctor who? Yes, quite right.

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Actually, you won't need to use a new slug. There is more than one way to do this. You can use a new entire slug, or you can use a secondary header which would consist of

INT A
INT B
INTERCUT
Dude runs
OUTSIDE
where he keeps talking.

Or even easier and just as fine to maintain ease of readability (and I have actually read this in the Screenwriting Bible)

You can just keep writing without the use of any new slug at all.

INT A
INT B
INTERCUT
Dude runs outside across the lawn.

No new intercut at all, the audience understands that he just went outside, and for shooting, the director will catch this and make a note that the guy ran outside. Heck, he might even make the shot continuous to maintain the flow of the script (depending on how the location works).


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Dreamscale
Posted: August 31st, 2010, 10:29am Report to Moderator
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I'm not doubting you, George, but IMO, that's not going to work.  You'd have no description of this new setting, INT or EXT, and to me, it's just not "right".

I mean if that's OK, why use SLUGS at all when changing scenes?  You know?

BTW, how's your progress?  5 days to go...
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George Willson
Posted: August 31st, 2010, 12:22pm Report to Moderator
Of The Ancients


Doctor who? Yes, quite right.

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The method I suggested is used best when the scenes are continuous. You know that the character is moving directly from one place to another without any break in the action. This is similar to a character moving from room to room in a house. You don't often have a new slug for every single room, nor do you even use secondary headers for every room change. You do most of the time, but when the character is constantly moving, there comes a point where you have to trust that reader can follow what's going on. If you blatantly write, "He runs outside" then you know that the character crossed the room to the door, opened it, and is now standing in the sunlight. The only way this would cause a problem in filming is if the interior and exterior are in different places. It happens, but as writers, that's not our problem. I'm not saying to make a habit of it because those slugs are essential to shooting, but as long as the move is clear, then it's all good.

As for me, I have 10 pages almost exactly. I have to tweak a location that runs for 15 pages, even though there are 3 or 4 scenes in that one place. I'm going to ramp up the end of the scene, take it outside and get it moving again instead of having talking heads. From there, I should have enough for them to do to link up the first 70 pages and the last 10. Going to try to make those 10 pages a sort of pre-climax climax for a subplot that is not fully completed yet.


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Coding Herman
Posted: August 31st, 2010, 1:48pm Report to Moderator
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I accidentally sneaked a catfight into my script. Boo-yah!


FEATURE:

Memwipe
- Sci-Fi, Action, Thriller (114 pages) - In a world where memories can be erased by request, a Memory Erasing Specialist desperately searches for the culprit when his wife becomes a target for erasure -- with his former colleagues hot on his trail.
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Dreamscale
Posted: August 31st, 2010, 6:13pm Report to Moderator
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Nice job, Herman!  I was hoping someone would incorporate some big cats into their script.  Nothing wrong with some lions and tigers...
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Grandma Bear
Posted: August 31st, 2010, 10:00pm Report to Moderator
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I'm starting to sweat about this now...  

I read mine today. I wasn't impressed...


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seamus19382
Posted: August 31st, 2010, 10:30pm Report to Moderator
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Quoted from Grandma Bear
I'm starting to sweat about this now...  

I read mine today. I wasn't impressed...


Sneak in a catfight!!!
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Grandma Bear
Posted: August 31st, 2010, 10:43pm Report to Moderator
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How do I make that work with one live female and four dead ones?...


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seamus19382
Posted: August 31st, 2010, 10:53pm Report to Moderator
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Quoted from Grandma Bear
How do I make that work with one live female and four dead ones?...


I really don't have an answer for that.  
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RayW
Posted: August 31st, 2010, 11:06pm Report to Moderator
Old Timer


Freedom

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Quoted from Grandma Bear
How do I make that work with one live female and four dead ones?...


Two words: Zom Bees!


I think I'd actually pay money to watch four zombie chicks go at it.
The old, slow classic kind.
None of that Ritalin deprived 28 Days Later stuff.

Of course, beer would make it better.
Maybe some sleep deprivation wouldn't hurt either.



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Dreamscale
Posted: August 31st, 2010, 11:12pm Report to Moderator
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Don't worry, Pia!  You don't need any cat fights.
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