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SimplyScripts Screenwriting Discussion Board    Unproduced Screenplay Discussion    Comedy Scripts  ›  Something Simple Moderators: bert
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Don
Posted: September 16th, 2006, 9:01am Report to Moderator
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So, what are you writing?

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Something Simple by Bill Cox - Comedy, Drama - Life is tough growing up in a small Mormon community in northern Arizona. Well, not so much tough as it is boring. So Scott, Rebecca, Nick and Frank deal with it the only way they know how: high school pranks. But their time in Snowflake is running out, their prank reservoir is running dry and maternial clocks are beginning to tick. Scott has been holding in his feelings for Rebecca since the day they met, and just when he's about to confess his love for her, a wrench is thrown into his plans...Or maybe two. Or three... 120 pages - doc, format


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MrBill
Posted: September 19th, 2006, 1:00am Report to Moderator
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Author here. Thanks to anyone who's even considered reading my first full length screenplay and I look forward (especially) to the negative feedback. This is only the first draft, and a revised version is sure to come in the near future.
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Shelton
Posted: September 19th, 2006, 10:23am Report to Moderator
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Bill,

A few quick observations after opening this up.

1st, change the font to 12 pt. Courier or Courier New.  That's standard for all scripts.  

2nd, Your margins are off.  Not sure if you just using the center, right, and left justification keys in word, but everything is way to the right.  Try checking out a few scripts on here, and you'll get a better idea of what they should look like.  There are a lot of writers who have preset tabs in word, so they may be able to help with that.  Me, I just started using Celtx after having RoughDraft for awhile, both are free programs available online.

And 3rd, break up the descriptive paragraphs a little, preferably before you exceed the four line mark.  Example from your first description.

The sky is completely clear, the morning sun rising on a wedding. Hundreds of rows of chairs forming a semi-circle around the altar.

The bride is REBECCA STANTON and the groom is SCOTT GARRISON. Scott stares lovingly into Rebecca’s eyes. She answers with a beaming smile.

His concentration is broken by a firm slap on the back from his Best Man, NICK MCCORMICK. The reverend clears his throat.

It's the exact same passage, but breaking it up helps to keep it flowing.  Don't worry too much about it.  I used to do this all the time, but it's a relatively easy fix.


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"I think I did pretty well, considering I started out with nothing but a bunch of blank paper." - Steve Martin
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MrBill
Posted: September 19th, 2006, 12:41pm Report to Moderator
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The format and font was correct before it was posted on the unpro page. Whenever it was changed from Microsoft Word to Wordpad is when it must have been changed. But I am very aware of formating, font and margin rules. Thanks for your advise!  
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Shelton
Posted: September 19th, 2006, 12:56pm Report to Moderator
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Oh yeah, if you changed it from Word to WordPad, it'll definitely screw up your format.  Better to just upload it as a .doc or convert it to pdf.


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MrBill
Posted: September 27th, 2006, 2:33am Report to Moderator
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I guess this will be my first bump. Did anyone read it?
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