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SimplyScripts Screenwriting Discussion Board    Unproduced Screenplay Discussion    Drama Scripts  ›  This is your life: revised "11" Moderators: bert
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  Author    This is your life: revised "11"  (currently 2767 views)
Chris_MacGuffin
Posted: October 30th, 2004, 4:39pm Report to Moderator
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From what I hear from reading these posts, your script is based on shock value. Unless you have a story and something to say, you should really reevaluate why you write screenplays. If you write just to shock, while then you should look for another career.
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Jason Byram
Posted: October 31st, 2004, 9:04am Report to Moderator
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Career?! Are you crazy? Writing is for fun and no-one said you can't post scripts for fun and serious work. And if you didn't read the script, sorry, why are you reading the posts? Sad...
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Chris_MacGuffin
Posted: October 31st, 2004, 11:49am Report to Moderator
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I read about five pages and couldn't read anymore.
It's not sad that I'm reading the posts, what's sad is that you write to shock.
Your scripts listed under drama, but it's so over the top, the audience can't care about the characters.
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dogglebe
Posted: October 31st, 2004, 1:09pm Report to Moderator
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Quoted from Jason Byram, posted October 31st, 2004, 9:04am at here
Career?! Are you crazy? Writing is for fun and no-one said you can't post scripts for fun and serious work. And if you didn't read the script, sorry, why are you reading the posts? Sad...


I read a few pages, which is probably as far as most people will read.  Reading stuff like this doesn't shock me; it annoys me.  I would rather read what people think on this discussion board than read your script.

And then there's the poor formatting....


Phil

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Jason Byram
Posted: November 1st, 2004, 2:25pm Report to Moderator
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Thank you all for your comments. They were greatly accepted. I love my fans.
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clever_name
Posted: November 11th, 2004, 8:49pm Report to Moderator
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There's really no reason you should be proud of just shocking people, it isn't that hard.  Anyone can shock someone by just going over the top and doing/saying things that are taboo in society.  At the end of the day your script is the equivilent of a geek show where you are simply horrifying the audience by seeing just how far your characters will go over the line of decency.

Being shocking can be a useful tool in writing...look at the Exorcist, a great film, but in it's day it was outrageously shocking.  But it's all about where you take the story after the shock wears off.

All you've created is scene after scene of people being 'outrageous'. And like you said, writing should be a fun thing (I totaly agree), but what's the fun in having people taken aback by your writing.  You should use writing as a way to let people into your imagination, and if these are the kinds of thoughts you have in your head, I sincerely hope I never meet you.


Jesus Christ Timmy!  Do not float above me while I'm dying in the abyss!
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Chris_MacGuffin
Posted: November 16th, 2004, 8:52pm Report to Moderator
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It shows your immaturity as a writer.
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