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It'll Never Change by Joshua Wilburn - Drama - A young woman whose experianced abandonment and drug addiction has seperated herself from the rest of society. With the help of her loose roommate, her boss and a young bartender, the young girl regains faith in people. But her past haunts her. 90 pages - doc, format
Hi Joshua, looking furthur than the first page, it does seem that you know a few of the basics, but you will need a proper script writing software to get read properly - as Simon has said - there are free ones out there and they will help you immensly. In a re-write though, I don't recommend more than four lines of description. The first page almost put me off reading any more of it. Plus, there is no need to add Title Cards etc, a producer will organize where things like that go, they are not needed in a spec. I was a little more intrigued in where this was going after the next few pages though, but don't have the time to read on today.
Previous posts have addressed the format issues, so I will not.
I stopped after one paragraph because I see fatal flaws that must be corrected. The most egregious that you are telling, not showing.
Quoted Text
The apartment is home to two college dropout girls. Brittany, a blond sex addict who sells make up door to door, and Moni, our anti-hero. Moni is a tall, skinny, dark haired girl who whose a drug addict. She smokes pot, does heroin, drinks and sometimes take ecstasy when she can get her hands on it.
How do we know Brittany is a sex addict? How do we know Moni is an anti-hero and a drug addict? You are not allowed to disclose these things, only the story can via dialogue or action.
I would suggest Dave Trottier's "The Screenwriter's Bible: A Complete Guide to Writing, Formatting, and Selling Your Script." It is a must-read and describes in detail the proper ways to correct your errors.